Start the Conversation

My friend Kimberly C. Paul interviewed me as one the first guests on her “Death by Design Podcast. She is a TedX speaker and the author of the recently release book, Bridging the Gap. (I’ll leave a link at the bottom of the page.) Kimberly worked for 18 years in Hospice and has gathered her experiences and stories together. She will have you smiling and crying and thinking as she covers the lessons her hospice patients taught her about life...and more importantly...death.

Death is largely swept under the rug in our society. We don’t want to talk about it. Too sad. Too scary. Too icky. We will plan the heck out of a surprise birthday party but leave our death up to our spouse or kids to clean up after. It’s like the baby that covers his eyes and thinks you can’t see him. You aren’t fooling anyone. We’re all going to die. Why not do it on our own terms?

I was deeply moved by our former First Lady, Barbara Bush’s final decision. She’d been battling COPD and had endured numerous hospitalizations when she finally decided she didn’t want any more. It was ok. She’d made peace. I’m sure she’d made arrangements. She said, “No, I’m done.” She sat up in bed and laughed and drank good bourbon and surrounded herself with love. What grace.

I’ve been hearing stories about my friend Fred who died this week. He had made a special point to visit and call people as he prepared for his own transition.

Mr. FixIt and I arrived at my cousin’s house yesterday afternoon. We had a family dinner and laughed and told stories and then we talked about his decision to stop therapy for his mesothelioma. The prognosis is he’ll survive another six months. That’s two years longer than we first expected to have and we’ve been so grateful that the last two years have been so wonderful. We don’t want him to leave us. There will be a hole in our hearts. AND, we accept his decision. His wonderful family will support him and walk him home.

I am providing my cousin’s wife with resources and phone calls and support and lots of love. I’m so happy to hear they’ve been having all the conversations they need to have. They done all the planning and the financial decisions. They’ve talked about their feelings. He’s made the decision to donate his body for research on mesothelioma. I am so encouraged by their ability to approach this with a steadfast love and respect.

Starting the conversation isn’t easy but so important. It’s a gift you can give those who are left behind. ❤

www.deathbydesign.com/buy-bridg…

“Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭11:14‬ ‭ESV‬‬