We’ve talked a little bit here about the apprehension some people are having surrounding re-entry….getting back out into the world after a year of Covid. Now is not the time to totally let down our guard, even if we’ve been fully vaccinated. There are variants of the Covid virus out there that may bomb right through our newfound immunity. And, the vaccines are 95% effective. They’ll more than likely keep you from being hospitalized with a severe case, but you could still carry the vaccine to someone who is not vaccinated or is immunocompromised.

That’s not the main problem, though. It’s more disconcerting to actually GO OUT simply because we’ve been IN. I’m am a solid ambivert. I love people, and I can be engaged and outgoing and fun at a party. AND…I need my alone time to recharge, I get anxious before social gatherings, and I have to weigh every decision heavily before I commit. There was a time, way back when I was first married to my second husband, that I actually became agoraphobic. I could go to work, come home, and go to the grocery store…but anything else became extremely uncomfortable and fear inducing.

I got over it that time by reading a lot about it and following some recommendations…namely practicing desensitization. I forced myself to go do things that were out of my comfort zone until I worked my way up to spending a long weekend alone in a small cabin up in the mountains of Colorado. That was HUGE for me at the time. The winter of 2019-20 was really busy for me because that’s the year I had the Girl Camper Raffle Trailer and I was out and about all season. Then…Covid hit and I didn’t travel anywhere for months at a time.

I found myself becoming fearful again of getting out on my own and I can’t have that. It doesn’t mesh with my lifestyle and it certainly doesn’t make me very happy to feel anxiety when I go to do something I know I’ve done a hundred times before. Taking a cue from the past, I’ve set out to doing things on my own a bit and yesterday was my first long outing in quite some time. I had a doctor’s appointment in the afternoon, then I took myself shopping and ran errands and had some lunch. I had a wonderful time and felt so much better when I got home.

As I was driving around, I received a phone call from my dermatologist’s office. She removed a spot on my chest on 4/1 and they just received the pathology report. It was a place she’s frozen twice but it keeps coming back, and I swear…if it didn’t sit right where my seatbelt rubs, I probably would have let it go. In the end, we decided it was probably best to take it off and it’s a good thing. It turned out to be a squamous cell carcinoma. Skin cancer. The good news is, the pathologist said the margins were all clear meaning she got it all. She offered to have me come in and take some more just for good measure or we can just watch it heal and see how it looks. I elected to wait and watch.

I was a sun worshiping fool. I’ve always been fair skinned and I was a devoted tanning bed user in my 30’s. I had to have a little color, right? Well, I’ve had melanoma and now squamous cell…the damage is done, but sunscreen is an absolute necessity. No negotiations there. It’s really hard to make younger women understand the real dangers of tanning beds and I think they should be outlawed…at least for younger women. Please be safe out there, cover up, and wear sunscreen. Someday, you’ll be glad you did!

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“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.””

Deuteronomy 31:6 ESV