I’m a procrastinator. I have a list as long as my arm to prepare for this trip west. I could have spent the entire day yesterday cleaning and organizing the trailer, doing laundry, straightening up the house. But yesterday was the Lord’s day, so Mr. FixIt and I went to church first. The rest of the day was ours. We went my mother’s family’s reunion and made the introductions. Mutual admiration was expressed. Everyone loves Mr. FixIt. He’s highly personable and, like me, strangers are just friends he hasn’t met yet. We went from there to the City Park and wandered around the carnival. We played a few cards of bingo. We went to a car show. We stopped and visited friends. One of the coolest things about dating Mr. FixIt is…we have a ton of mutual friends so the comfort level is already there. It’s the easiest thing I’ve ever done. This man knows people wherever we go. Literally. My family reunion? A guy that worked at the plant. Church? The daughter of a friend in his bowling league. Car show? Two guys we went to high school with. It’s crazy…and SO fun!
We ended the day with dinner out.
We.
We’ve been “us” for several months now yet it still surprises us sometimes. Because I have been trying to keep him under wraps, my posts have always been “I”. Now that we’ve decided to “go live” so to speak, there seems to be a bit of a learning curve. Like remembering to introduce the other. We’re at that point in our relationship where we’ve just passed this margin threshold where we have built up enough recent memories together to say …”Remember when we…” Oh, I love that! The icing on the cake is our shared memories from high school. I actually remember him from 2nd grade but he has no memory of me back then.
We.
Odd…but so lovely and exciting and full of promise. I love when he tells stories of “us”. I love that he got teary eyed when he read some of your comments about finding each other. I love that even though he had a difficult childhood, he is a kind, gentle, peaceful man. I love how he reaches for my hand when we stand to worship and pray in church. I love this man…my lifelong friend…my best friend.
Someone commented yesterday that she didn’t understand my once a pickle, always a pickle analogy meaning I will always be a widow. The thing is, grief has no rule book. She felt remarrying meant she was no longer a widow. At what point does the pain of grief become fond memories? It’s different for everyone. And grief is variable by time. You can be fine, think it’s gone, truly fall in love, yet still be blindsided by a chance encounter, or the smell of familiar cologne. The way the light slants in at supper time. The sound of your grandchildren playing. Memories remain alive when you feed them. No, I’ll always be a widow. But that doesn’t mean I can’t be joyful. And crazy in love. ❤️
“No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Joshua 1:5 NIV
I love that you’ve shared through grief and happiness. Congratulations to you and Mr. Fix it.
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Thank you. God bless you!
This sounds like a very sweet relationship, a true keeper;)
I became an unexpected widow when I was 34 with 2 young children. I too thought my world had ended. My minister sat at my kitchen table the very night my husband was killed and told me that “the highest compliment I could pay him, was to find love again”. To this day I am still a little confused by this, but never the less, I remarried 4 years later, and we are celebrating our 30th anniversary today!! I don’t think of myself as a widow anymore, but there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of my deceased husband in some way or another. These are memories and thoughts that I carry deep inside my heart. If you can share these thoughts and memories with you Mr. Fix-it that is an added bonus to your relationship!!! There are some people who will never understand grief until it happens to them. You never ever stop grieving, you just learn to live your life in a different way. Oh Ginny, you already know all of this! Ha! I am just so very happy for you and Mr. Fix-it!!! I’m anxious to hear more of your story as it unfolds!!!
How beautiful, especially the part about the greatest compliment. Thanks for sharing!
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Although I am married, I will always be TB’s widow. I love my husband and he is fun and kind and loving. He is a good man. Most times my thoughts are of those beautiful memories TB and I made in our 26 yrs together. But sometimes the grief slides in once again and I am overcome by what might have been; seeing our Grands graduate high school, get married , grow old together. I push grief away and deal with my life as it is. I have a good man to share my life. A friend. A companion. I am blessed.
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After my husband of over half my life said he was moving to greener grass I did not see or talk to him for 6 years. I felt like I had experienced death. Having seen him briefly several times in the past year it now is more realistic; divorce shattered our family. I remarried 3 years ago and feel that God brought me exactly the man I need now. He feels the same about me. I felt awkward occasionally during the transition to another version of myself,non the less one my friends had to get used to, as well. People usually lag behind in their definition of me and I think they finally get it. I will identify with your new journey in many ways and am excited to follow you!
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I looked at a photo of the Walker cousins, 1968, mine and Barry’s, K and B’s, and T and R’s today. I even posted it! Time flies. Two of the children photoed are already in Heaven…. We must catch the Sunlight of our days with as much vim and vigor as we can, andlive through the Staright, expecting the light to return. I am happy for you. Yes, once a widow, always a widow….two parents of these kids are also in Heaven. Life is short. We never forget those we have loved, and I feel it is impossible to even try to. I honor my husband, my son, and my grandson…. ’til I join them..
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