Put on your red shoes and dance the blues! I love to dance and my favorite place to dance is at a concert when everyone else is standing up and dancing, too. Gosh, it’s been a long time since I’ve danced to live music. Lately, I been feeling the sting of these last couple of years. The isolation of the pandemic and not getting to just do what I want, when I want is making me cranky and restless. I’m getting a HUGE case of 24 month cabin fever!
I haven’t stayed inside and away from everyone for the last 24 months. I’ve traveled…safely. I’ve camped…safely. I’ve had company over…safely. Don’t get me wrong…I’m all about safety. But I’m probably one of the most spontaneous people you’re likely to meet. Well, I used to be…BC. Before Covid. I love to throw some things in a bag and hit the road at a moment’s notice. I haven’t done that for a long, long time.
When we watched the news on Tuesday night, I turned to my sweetie and said, “We need to go to Columbus tomorrow.” Now, I may be a spontaneous person, but my sweetheart is…not so much. He likes to know what’s coming and he isn’t a big fan of change. That being said, he is my number one fan and he knew there had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation for this sudden twist in the plot.
It was more than just the ice and snow coming. I had one of my “bad nights” Tuesday night. I was filled with anxiety and I couldn’t turn off my brain till finally I gave up at 5:30 in the morning. I fell into a deep sleep for four hours and when I woke up, I started throwing things in the truck so we could get the heck out of Dodge.
I don’t have “bad nights” nearly as often as I used to. They were a daily occurrence in the first couple of years after Mr. Virgo died. I tried every tool in my tool box. I saw that there was a big snowstorm out in Denver and I knew my youngest was going to be driving in that to work. Throw it to God. What happens if we get all the way up there and they cancel my surgery because of the weather? Throw it to God. Ugh…I remember how I felt after that surgery last year. I hate to have to go through that again. Throw it to God.
I was wadding up thoughts faster than a sixth grade boy making spitballs. I shot them over to Jesus as fast as he could catch them. And you know what? He just kept catching them! He smiled and said, “I can do this all night, kiddo. How’s about you get some sleep and let me take care of the tough stuff for a while? Whadya say?’
That was at about 5:30am. I smiled back and whispered, “You’re on!”
I turned over, pulled the covers up to my chin, released my tongue from the roof of my mouth where I firmly press it when I’m anxious, and repeated my mantra. Don’t think…don’t think…don’t think. You can’t think if you’re busy thinking, “Don’t think.”
So, here we are in a beautiful hotel suite with huge windows overlooking the river. We made a run to the local Kroger store and have enough good food and snacks to tide us over till we head home a day or two after the surgery. I’m happily knitting on my sweater. Mr. FixIt is glad to see me smiling and less tense. Everything is going to work out great. And I’m really looking forward to feeling better and more like my old self. Then I can get back out there and dance!
❄️❤️❄️
“Let them praise his name with dancing, making melody to him with tambourine and lyre!”
Psalm 149:3 ESV