This is where I left Mr. Virgo’s lock of hair when I hiked into the wilderness this summer to say good-bye and leave him in the place he loved the most. As I have negotiated this path, I have come upon stumbling blocks which could have made me falter. It’s what we do with those stumbling blocks that determine our direction…up or down.
A few weeks ago, I realized I had not seen postings for awhile from a person I considered a friend and family member. After doing some investigation, I realized this person had not only unfriended me on FB, but had also disconnected from my children’s pages as well as Mr. Virgo’s. I was hurt and confused. I reached out, in the off chance that this was accidental and received no response. After giving it some time, I accepted that this person intentionally disconnected.
When something like this happens, you can choose many responses. You can go into self-blame mode and try to figure out what on earth you did wrong. My thought on this is, after a quick inventory of your own behaviors, self-deprecation accomplishes nothing but pain and damage to your own self esteem. Of course, if it’s something you have done, by all means you should apologize and try to make it right. You could always get mad and say negative things about the person, but we all know that’s not productive…one of the perks of being ‘of a certain age’.
I don’t know what precipitated this. Perhaps I wasn’t grieving in a way she felt was appropriate. Perhaps I posted something that hurt her feelings. Maybe the fact that I have found love again so quickly makes her feel my love for Mr. Virgo wasn’t genuine. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. I can only control my own response and choose how to feel. So, here is my choice. I choose love. I choose to turn this stumbling block into a stepping stone and move upward. I sent her a text to let her know I was thinking of her and that I am praying for her. I wish her well. I enjoyed knowing her. I am not less of a person because she chooses not to be in our lives. Besides, we will see each other again on the other side and will have Eternity to figure it out.