I’ve had to say goodbye to several fur babies and each one hurts more than you can imagine. The first time I ever had to put a dog down, it wasn’t even mine. It was my late father-in-law’s. He just didn’t have the heart to do it. He asked if I would. I don’t know why, but I’m the one that always had to take the “kids” for their last ride. Women are stronger in this, maybe. Maybe it’s because I was mostly raised on a farm that I got elected. For whatever reason, and as hard as it was, it was always an honor to be with a beloved companion in their last moments and let them see and hear someone they loved and trusted. It is the final gift you can give them.

The other day, my friend Deneene had to say goodbye to her beloved Beni. It carried the usual pain of losing a companion animal, but it had an added layer of pain. Beni was the last of the pack that was left from the animals she shared with her late husband. Losing this dog meant losing another important connection to Mike. It compounds the grief.

Losing a loved one is like dropping a big stone in a still pond. That first contact between the rock and the water causes the biggest wave. Then the ripples begin to slowly spread out and touch more and more of the space between the event and the shore. Since there is no timetable for grief, many years can go by and you still encounter a wave that originated from the center.

Beni was a good dog. He rarely barked but when he did, it was more like saying hello than it was a warning. He was gentle and sweet and other animals seemed to know he was a good boy. He had a rocky start. Deneene’s daughter found him abandoned inside a crate. He surely would have starved to death if she hadn’t found him and took him in. His leg was severely injured and he always walked with a bit of a limp. But, dogs are the only animal that love you more than they do themselves and he never knew an enemy once he knew the love of his girl.

Cas brought Beni to visit Deneene. They had a strong bond. Deneene often called and asked her to bring Beni over for a visit…or maybe let him spend the weekend. Before long, Beni just ended up staying with Deneene and that was it. They were attached at the hip. A little over a year ago, Deneene knew Beni didn’t have too much longer with them, so she brought another dog home. She has never been without a companion animal and she wasn’t about to this time, either. 

Griffen the Grey joined their pack. A solid little French Bulldog puppy that everyone fell in love with. He was Beni’s annoying little brother who made him get up and move around more than he really wanted to. Maybe that’s what kept him going this last year. One of Beni’s favorite things to do was ride in the kayak with his mom. He wore a life vest in his later years because he wasn’t strong enough to keep his head above water.

Last Friday, Deneene knew Beni was done. He stopped eating. Sometimes he couldn’t stand up without falling down. She waited for him to tell her when…and he did. She set the date for Monday, then treated Beni to a beautiful farewell weekend with all his favorite things. They went for a ride in the car and a swim in the lake. And they went for ice cream. Griff seemed to know something was up because he just laid close to Beni all weekend without trying to engage him in play.

When the last ride was over, they brought their good boy home and buried him in a beautiful part of the yard, in the cool shade of a tree. They placed a statue of St. Francis at his head to watch over him. And Griffen laid near the grave all day, waiting for his buddy, honoring his friendship, mourning his passing.

Other animals miss their brothers and sisters when they cross over the Rainbow Bridge, just like we do. It’s sad for everyone. Even though we know they aren’t suffering anymore, we still may feel guilty, like maybe we should have…could have…done more for our friends. In the wild, an animal goes off in the woods by themselves to die when it’s their time. Domestic pets rely on us to make the humane decision for them.

Those pets who own a person are the most blessed because they get to take a little bit of their human’s heart with them…just as they leave behind a little piece of their own. I’ve heard it said, eventually you end up with the heart of a dog…one who loves everyone unconditionally.

My heart is with you, Deneene. And with all of you who have had to say goodbye to a beloved pet…especially if that pet was the last of the pack you shared with your loved one.

❤️

“For what happens to the children of man and what happens to the beasts is the same; as one dies, so dies the other. They all have the same breath, and man has no advantage over the beasts, for all is vanity. All go to one place. All are from the dust, and to dust all return.”

Ecclesiastes 3:19-20 ESV