When Mr. Virgo and I were beginning to think about retirement, I was adamant about one thing. I was NOT going to spend my retirement sitting in front of the television all day, every day…day in and day out. It wasn’t going to happen. That’s when I struck upon the idea of getting a camper. He was an avid golfer and I figured he would be thrilled to toodle along with me, towing our little house on wheels from course to course. Surprisingly, he agreed and we started looking for the perfect camper.

Fast forward a few months and he had died, along with so many dreams of the future we had planned. Television was no longer a part of my life, but the price I paid for quiet evenings was dreadfully steep. I disconnected the satellite and didn’t look back. For five years, I traveled and wrote and learned to live alone for the first time in my life. Eventually the pain of my grief eased, but I never, ever missed television one iota.

When I came off the road and started living at the farm, the TV was hooked up to satellite and I felt it was important, living that far out on my own, to have some access to news and weather. So, I kept it…but didn’t watch it. Then…along came Mr. FixIt. 

We had strict rules at the farm. We did not watch TV. We played cards, cooked dinner together, and went for long walks. We created projects to do and went for drives in the country and literally just sat on the porch and watched it rain. It was peaceful and he was so happy to be with me, he never pushed the “no TV” rule.

Ahhhh….as with all things, the honeymoon was short lived. When we moved into the big house at the Ponderosa, there was a new set of rules. It started out slowly. The news. Maybe a sitcom or two. Then, before I knew what was happening, the TV was on WAY more than my liking. But, I learned something in losing Mr. Virgo. It wasn’t all about me. It was never meant to be all about me. I was just trying to make it so because it was something I loathed and I wanted him to loathe it as well.

I’ve posted a meme here many times and included my Ten Rules in the care and feeding of a relationship. One of them was… “Don’t try to change him. You cannot change him. Do not, do not, do not try to change him.” I’ve given up on the TV thing. If Mr. FixIt wants to watch the TV till the cows come home…fine. I cannot change him. However, I CAN change me and how I respond to it. That’s when I started devoting the hours before bed to my writing and reading my devotionals and catching up with family and friends. 

So, here we are at the beach. After the news, I picked up my iPad and came down to the bedroom to write. And, lo and behold, about ten minutes later, he popped his head in the door and asked if I wanted to head down to the sound to watch the sunset. You bet I do, sweetheart! I’m closing this for the night and going out with my love and watch the sun close on another lovely day away…just he and me…and no TV!

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“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.”

Galatians 5:16 ESV