![\"\"](\"https://i0.wp.com/www.marshmallowranch.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Training-for-my-flight-next-week-Wish-me-luck.png?fit=819%2C1024&ssl=1\")
The world has gone bat-stick crazy! It reminds me of The Lord of the Flies when all the kids went feral. Socially acceptable norms seem to have vanished. Especially on airplanes! Did you see the video that was circulated on social media this week? You don’t usually see women as the perpetrators of violence in the public sphere. She had to be physically restrained after hitting, spitting on, and pulling the hair of a woman sitting in a seat. Do I know what led to this pugilistic outburst? No, I do not. But there is no need to act this way anywhere, let alone on an airplane.
\n\n\nSomeone will say the perpetrator was mentally ill or having a breakdown of some type. That may be true… we don’t know. Let me just say this: social media and those who pander for “likes and shares” are just as guilty as the woman doing the spitting. The people filming and sharing, the news outlets flashing it on the evening news, the algorithms promoting violence, and feeding the millions of humans glued to their screens… hooked and reeled in for their drug of choice… dopamine. This magic neurotransmitter in the brain is associated with pleasure and reward. And yes… it is addictive. Being mindful of the amount of time you spend in front of a screen is the first step in recognizing that you may have a problem.
\n\n\nI guess Boxing Barbie in the video doesn’t recognize that this behavior is inappropriate. So, how do we get the smoke back in the bottle? I’m afraid it’s going to be difficult in this climate. I’m praying that new moms start raising a generation of kind humans who are rewarded with the satisfaction of doing good things and helping people. It won’t be easy, but I still believe it’s doable… someday.
\n\n\nIn the meantime, I hope you realize this was tongue-in-cheek. Violence doesn’t end violence. Love does. I’ll leave my proverbial boxing gloves at home and take a Bible instead. God’s Word is more powerful than anything that could be thrown at me. I don’t take no truck in fighting with people. To quote the infamous Sweet Brown, “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”
\n\n\n💜
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nBe sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter: 5-8 ESV
\n\n
***Gratitude Journal*** Today, I am grateful for the love and peace I have in my life. I’m grateful for the friends in my life who have become like family to me. We lost three of our senior classmates in the last week. We don’t have time to act a fool. It’s time to share loving kindness. Put it out in the world. Be the shining light on the hill. Be the change!\n\n", "date_published": "2025-06-20T04:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2025/06/20/training-for-my-flight.html", "tags": ["Faith","Peace","Anger","Kindness","Control"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2025/01/28/feeling-violated.html", "title": "Feeling Violated", "content_html": "\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/4b12877118.jpg\")
I went to knitting group yesterday morning. Even though it was only 17° when I walked out the front door, I was determined to hang with my home girls and catch up. We haven’t gathered since the first week of December so were all really excited to see what was going on with the group. I got about three inches of the market basket done. It’s coming out great and it will be perfect to sit by the Big Red Chair to hold my knitting.
\n\n\nI haven’t been over the hill to our little burg in a minute so I enjoyed visiting Carolyn at the Quilt Shop and the nice gal at the Assessor’s Office. When I got home, I fixed us a very late breakfast. I made egg sandwiches on those sourdough English Muffins I made last week. We still have a few left and they won’t last much longer. I fed my starter yesterday morning and by this evening I prepared my pre-ferment, or levain as it is called. I’m going to bake a couple of loaves of RuthAnn Zimmerman’s Soft Sourdough Sandwich Bread today.
\n\n\nAfter our brunch, we headed over to The Farm to check on things. We haven’t been out there for a little bit because of the holidays and all this snow. I was relieved when I pulled into the driveway and there were no tire tracks or footprints indicating someone had been there. So, imagine my dismay when I walked in the back to and immediately knew someone had been in there! Every cabinet and drawer were open…all over the house. They even went in the attic crawl space…either looking for drugs or something of any value. Of course, they were met with a whole lot of nothing. The house has been pretty well emptied out except for some pieces of furniture a la Goodwill.
\n\n\nI couldn’t figure out how they got in. The doors were locked. When I searched around, I found the small window open in the kitchen off the back porch. I was so sad. I felt so violated. It made me mad! Every year I declare that place as holy ground, but I was a month or so late this time. We contacted the State Patrol and I’ll talk to a deputy tomorrow. I secured each window, but like my PopPop used to say, “A lock is for keeping the honest people out. It won’t keep the bad guys out.”
\n\n\nI told Mr. FixIt, this will not deter me from having my sabbaticals out there, but I’ll have protection with me when I go! I’m calling in all the Angels to guard and protect my grandma’s house.
\n\n\n❄️🩵❄️
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n“Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need.” Ephesians 4:28 ESV
\n\n
***Gratitude Journal***\n\n\n
Today I am grateful the thieves did not damage anything at The Farm and God kept it safe from harm.
#breakingandentering, #robbery, #TheFarm, #Violated
\n\n", "date_published": "2025-01-28T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2025/01/28/feeling-violated.html", "tags": ["Faith","The Farm","Anger","Forgiveness"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2023/12/08/its-time-for-my-annual.html", "title": "It’s Time for my Annual PSA", "content_html": "\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/18cd8d8c37.jpg\")
Every year I get up on my little soapbox and talk to you about why I say “Happy Holidays.” Now, before we go any further, I’m not saying this should be YOUR greeting if what you wish to say is Merry Christmas! If you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time, you know I lived a Jewish life for twenty eight years so I have personal experience. Someone who is Jewish will most likely never say a word when you wish them Merry Christmas, even though Hanukkah may have already started. After all, they would never think to come up to you and say Happy Hanukkah. They more than likely will give you a gracious “Thank you…and same to you!” There is no offense taken.
\n\n\nBut we are living in dangerous times right now. Hate is rising fast and antisemitism has reared it’s ugly head in a BIG way. I cannot express enough how scary this is to me. My family is Jewish. My children and grandchildren identify deeply with Judaism, even if they are not practicing Jews. I cannot sit idly aside and say nothing.
\n\n\nI have experienced antisemitism myself. Someone in my own family treated me with contempt and asked me to put my Star of David inside my sweater. When my Jewish husband expressed an interest in moving to West Virginia to open a practice, this same family member told him, and I quote… “Well, we had a family of Jews down here once. Come down here from New York City. Wanted to change this and change that. Well, they lit outta here pretty quick when they burned that cross on their lawn!” To. His. Face.
\n\n\nI’ve held my child while she cried because the other kids called her a “stupid ****ing Jew.”
\n\n\nThis hatred against people for who and what they are is straight from the devil himself. God is Love. The very God these people profess to follow would NEVER treat people like that. The Jews are His CHOSEN people! JESUS was Jewish. He never wore a cross because he hadn’t been crucified yet. Christianity hadn’t been truly formed yet.
\n\n\nI don’t want to go on and on about it, but there are FOURTEEN religious holidays between Thanksgiving and Christmas. From St. Nicholas Day to Bodhi Day to Yule to Zarathosht Diso…many faiths celebrate during the month of December.
\n\n\nSince I am not a mind reader, and I cannot tell what someone believes by looking at them, I say Happy Holidays. Because, chances are, they’re celebrating at least one of them this month. If I know for certain they celebrate Christmas, then of course…I say a hearty Merry Christmas to them. If I know for certain they are Jewish, I say Happy Hanukkah.
\n\n\nOtherwise, it’s Happy Holidays from this left wing liberal hippy-chick farm girl!
\n\n\nI’m not scolding anyone. I’m just asking those who mistreat others to put themselves in the shoes of the downtrodden, the marginalized, the oppressed, the belittled, the victimized, the beleaguered, the beaten down, the underdog. Because they are just as human as any of us.
\n\n\n🩵
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n”If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.“
\n1 John 4:20 ESV\n
#NoLoveKnowHate, #KnowLoveNoHate, #NoHate
\n\n", "date_published": "2023-12-08T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2023/12/08/its-time-for-my-annual.html", "tags": ["Love","Peace","Wisdom","Anger","Fear"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2023/06/15/what-we-see-matters.html", "title": "What We See Matters", "content_html": "\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/ce6b876e84.jpg\")
The Bible tells us that our eyes are like lamps that bring light into our bodies. The health of our eyes will determine if our bodies are healthy, filled with light…or unhealthy, filled with darkness. I’ve been pondering this a great deal lately. Without delving into politics, I will say we are being given many opportunities to practice this noble and wise scripture this week. I knew in my heart that the events of Tuesday were liable to serve as a key to open the floodgates of angry and hateful rhetoric.
\n\n\nThere are people who planned hateful things on Tuesday. I kept hearing rumors of it, never dreaming it would come to my doorstep. Then I received a private message on my Facebook page by some man I did not know. Usually those are fairly innocuous pleas to make them the happiest man in the world and send them a friend request. Yeah…that’s a hard pass, fella. You’d have to get up pretty early to pull one over on me.
\n\n\nThis message was different. My profile picture for the month of June is a series of colorful stripes with the word ALLY across it…in support of my daughter and her wife and my countless friends who are members of the LGBTQ+ community. The message I received was hate filled with ugly, vulgar terms to describe who I am for displaying such a thing. My first thought was shock. I surely wasn’t expecting something like that. Then I was angry and frustrated because this is what my beautiful daughter and daughter-in-law face on the daily.
\n\n\nThen I felt pity. Pity that people feel they need to treat others with such hatred and ugliness. Pity that he obviously doesn’t know Jesus. The Biblical Jesus that I know. I knew his eyes must be unhealthy because he had such darkness in him. I wish he knew how much Jesus loves him and how much better his life could be if only he would find Him. I’m witness to know the incredible difference a life walking with God makes. I prayed for his salvation, then I blocked him and reported the attack to Facebook. I did not engage him because that’s what people like this want. Reaction. I failed to give him that.
\n\n\nTuesday night, Daughter #2 called to wish me a happy birthday. She wanted to know all about my day and when I asked her about hers, she said it was great…right up to the very last minute before closing. She received a phone call at work from a man that sounded pleasant enough. He asked if they carried a certain product. She said they did. He went on to tell her why he needed it and the thought maybe he was oversharing a little bit so she just made a pleasant comment about how glad she was it helped. Then he said, “Well enough about that. Let’s talk about the f.i.n.a.l s.o.l.u.t.i.o.n. There’s J.E.W.S out there, you know!” (For those of you who do not know what that is, it’s what the N.a.z.i.s called the H.o.l.o.c.a.u.s.t.) I am writing this with p.e.r.i.o.d.s between the letters of certain words to keep from drawing the attention of nefarious people.
\n\n\nNow, you have to understand…my daughter grew up J.e.w.i.s.h in a small community in Colorado. She was bullied all through school because of her religious identity. As a matter of fact, it was so bad it caused her to self-harm and nearly drove her to s.u.i.c.i.d.e. So when this guy called and laid that on HER doorstep, she didn’t miss a beat and lit into him with the same mouth I used to kiss good night when she was little. She is fierce and stands up to people. Unfortunately, in this day and age, that can be outright dangerous and as soon as the words were out of her mouth, she knew she had given him exactly what he wanted.
\n\n\nI’m not telling you this to stir things up. I won’t engage in debates over things such as this. I’ll do all the things I can to combat hatred in all forms. And I’ll pray fiercely in hopes that we can somehow normalize kindness and love our neighbors again. We cannot hide our heads in the sand and think this kind of thing isn’t happening everywhere. But we CAN choose wisely what we let into our eyes and make a conscious effort to feed the light.
\n\n\nThere are two animals within us…a good one and a bad one. The one we feed is the one who survives.
\n\n\n❤️?
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n““Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light. But when it is unhealthy, your body is filled with darkness. Make sure that the light you think you have is not actually darkness. If you are filled with light, with no dark corners, then your whole life will be radiant, as though a floodlight were filling you with light.””
\nLuke 11:34-36 NLT\n
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
\n\n\nBring Peace into your garden with one of my photographs and a fitting scripture…John 14:27
\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/6e514ad7f3.jpg\")
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/1df586cc4a.jpg\")
It turns out, it may not have been the smartest thing. I’ve been trying to figure out what I want to do with my Twitter accounts. Things are flaming out of control over there and I just don’t want to be a part of it. Besides that, they are running on a skeleton crew. Who knows what their security is like, right? I have two Twitter accounts…one for Marshmallow Ranch, and the other strictly grief related.
\n\n\nI finally made up my mind and deleted both accounts and took the app off my phone. As the day wore on, the more I thought about it, the more I regretted deleting the grief related one. So, I went back later and reinstated just the grief account. I did not download the app again…I’ll only access Twitter from my iPad. I may change down the road and delete the app there, as well. I can always just go to Twitter online and bypass the need for the app anyway.
\n\n\nHeading into the holidays is the worst time in the world to abandon people in the throes of grief. The thing I did not realize is this…when you deactivate an account then reactivate it, your followers…disappear. As in zero, zilch, nada…back to square one. All that work I did for years to build it up and it’s just gone. It’s ok, though. I just spent some time reconnecting with some of my previous followers. And I published a tweet explaining the situation.
\n\n\nAt least the political stuff isn’t showing up and for that I am most grateful!
\n\n\nWe cleaned house in preparation for the big dinner on Friday. I was hampered by a twinge in my back that showed up when I…of all things…pulled on my socks yesterday morning! This getting old crap is for the birds, I’m telling you!
\n\n\nThere was a rug on the floor in the walkway through the kitchen to the back of the house. It’s been there since…forever. It was there when I got here. Over time, all the wear and traffic soil got so bad that I couldn’t stand it for another minute. Unfortunately, it was pretty well glued down with double stick tape. I pulled it all up and threw it out. Then I vacuumed up the dust and bits of old tape and got down on my hands and knees to scrub up the places where the sticky stuff had hardened on the floor.
\n\n\nWhen I was finished, the kitchen looked brighter and more airy and I was really happy with it. I’m thinking I might want to paint the cabinets a light color…kind of give it a facelift without putting a lot of money into it. That’s down the road. Too many other things need our attention first.
\n\n\nWe got closer to getting the tree up. Mr. FixIt washed all the windows inside and out in the family room. We always set the tree in front of the picture window because I want people to see it when they drive out our road. Our friend Richard dropped by to pick up a jar of the cranberry sauce I made Sunday. I touched base with Hubby #1 to wish him and his family a Happy Thanksgiving. Daughter #2 called to check in before she and her wife leave for her in-laws’ and her dad’s for the holiday. I’m glad they get a chance to get away. It seems all they do is work and come home.
\n\n\nMy daughter was saddened…as am I…with the news of the shooting at the gay bar in Colorado Springs. The beautiful people in that community have been ostracized and abused for so long and violence is escalating against them. They have so few places they can go where they feel safe to be themselves…to feel loved and at home. And now, another one of those safety zones has been taken away from them. I’m not only sad, I’m angry. My daughter and her wife are members of the LGBTQ+ community. When I saw the news, I wasn’t fearful that they were there…it was in another city and they aren’t party people. But…somebody’s mama is grieving their lost child this week. There will be…yet again…more empty chairs at the tables of their loved ones this holiday season.
\n\n\nYou know…here’s how I feel. I think God will very likely forgive us if we aren’t perfect with the dogma. But, I think He’ll be pretty darned upset if we don’t get the “Loving Others” part right. He SAID that’s the most important thing. So that’s why I stepped away from Twitter yesterday. I’ll stay and love on the brokenhearted, but I’m not feeding the hate-mongers and I’m not going to be dragged along by someone else’s ugly narrative.
\n\n\n?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2022-11-22T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2022/11/22/when-bad-things-happen.html", "tags": ["Peace","Anger","Choices","Kindness"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2022/06/28/thou-shalt-not-bully.html", "title": "Thou Shalt Not Bully", "content_html": "\n“If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.”
\n1 John 4:20-21 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/f8e3998cc5.jpg\")
I was angry last week. Now I’m more angry. I shared a post on my personal Facebook page regarding the decision from SCOTUS that will affect all women. I have my own beliefs about it, and I shared them. A dear friend countered with another perspective as is her right. I didn’t engage…I listened respectfully. Honestly, I didn’t really think any more about it because we were camping and I was trying to stay away from all the angry discourse on social media.
\n\n\nYesterday, I discovered the comments on my post took a turn and people were attacking my friend for her beliefs. Not only that, some started sending her viscous texts. They attacked her work. They encouraged others to do so, as well. It was unrelenting. I never take down posts, but I did this one out of respect for my friend. I never unfriend someone over politics or differing opinions. But I WILL unfriend and block someone for bullying…so fast it’ll make your head spin.
\n\n\nI know it seems like civil discourse is dead these days. It makes me sad to see such vitriol…especially from women to other women. We all have opinions. We may not agree with others, but there is never a point where bullying is ok. Respect each other. Show a little self control. I certainly have not been perfect at this. If you don’t like what you read, scroll on. Unhook. Snooze. Unfriend. Block. But never, ever bully my peeps. That is NOT cool. Jesus wouldn’t do that, so neither should we!
\n\n\nI spent the afternoon riding around the property on the tractor…mowing and contemplating. Should I say anything? Or just let it go? I decided every moment is a teaching moment, so here I am. Teaching Respect 101.
\n\n\nIt made the afternoon fly by!
\n\n\n?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2022-06-28T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2022/06/28/thou-shalt-not-bully.html", "tags": ["Anger","Change","Friends","Frustration"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2022/05/25/vicarious-trauma-and-senseless-loss.html", "title": "Vicarious Trauma and Senseless Loss", "content_html": "\n““You shall not hate your brother in your heart, but you shall reason frankly with your neighbor, lest you incur sin because of him. You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.”
\nLeviticus 19:17-18 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/1a656f587c.jpg\")
Something happened Monday night that I didn’t tell you about because I wanted to ruminate on it a bit. I do my best thinking when I drive and this deserved some serious cogitation. I was settled in for the night in The Big Birdhouse out by the garden at my son-in-law’s parents house. Ben and Sue are kind enough to let me plug into the electric out in the shed so I can have my own little space and “pretend camp” in the driveway.
\n\n\nI had already made the decision to pack up and head home yesterday morning and was just finishing up my scheduled post when Sue texted.
\n\n\n“Ben is coming out to get you in here. Cops are looking for two armed and dangerous men!”
\n\n\nI jumped up and threw a few things into an overnight bag just as Ben knocked on the door. When I opened it up, there were flashing blue lights all over the place so we locked everything up and quickly scurried inside. The neighbor had alerted Sue and said the police were scouring her yard. We went around and closed all the blinds and locked all the doors including the deadbolts.
\n\n\nI noticed Ben rummaging round and half-joking asked if he was getting his gun. He is a retired policeman. He came around the door and asked if I wanted one, too. I only paused for second when I took the loaded revolver and placed it on the nightstand beside my bed. I was sleeping in the guest wing and wasn’t close enough to feel protected. Yet….
\n\n\nMy heart is changing about the issue of firearms. Mr. Virgo was all about protecting what was ours…including our lives, our stuff, and our right to bear arms. I took a concealed carry class and had a permit. When we worked on the ranch in southern Colorado, we both open carried when we were out on the property because there were dangerous characters out there…two-legged as well as four.
\n\n\nWhen Mr. Virgo died, he left me with no less than seventeen firearms…most of which I traded in for a beautiful diamond ring. I did, however, keep his beautiful western nickel plated long barrel .357 as well as the replica service revolver. After he died, I carried a .357 with me whenever I traveled alone…in my camper and in my truck. I felt safer with it and that was the point.
\n\n\nHowever…as I have aged and I have seen more and more senseless gun violence, I am less inclined to carry it with me. For one thing, there was a terrible injured deer at our place a couple of years ago. I asked my friend Sparky who I should have come put it out of its misery for me. She laughed and said, “You’ll probably just have to do it yourself. We live in the country, you know?” I knew. I was no stranger to hunting and I was no stranger to putting a suffering animal mercifully out of its misery.
\n\n\nI carried the loaded .357 out around the corner of the house where the poor deer was standing. I carefully took note of the surroundings to make sure I wasn’t overlooking any danger beyond the animal. I was not shooting towards a road or another house. There was nothing but unpopulated hillside on the other side of the deer. I carefully raised the weapon, took aim, breathed through my shot, and the gun fired. I felt the strong kick of the force in my hands. And looked trepidatiously to see the damage done to the poor doe.
\n\n\nNothing.
\n\n\nShe stood there with her big doe eyes, looking straight at me, still chewing the mouthful of grass she’d been munching as I aimed.
\n\n\nThis told me something about myself. If I can’t hit a deer not fifteen to twenty feet away from me in a calm and calculated fashion, I sure as hell can’t hit an attacker in the heat of a violent act. I no longer had the heart for it.
\n\n\nMy guns have remained in the safe, locked away ever since. I’ve kept them for a couple of reasons. If I really HAD to, and the lives of my loved ones were in danger, I would try to protect myself and them as best I could. And, they are one of the last things I have that belonged to Mr. Virgo. AND…I don’t want them in the hands of some nefarious character where they might be used in a heinous act.
\n\n\nLike the shooting of more innocent children yesterday.
\n\n\nBabies. They are still shooting babies in their classrooms.
\n\n\nI wish people were as anti-gun violence as they are anti-abortion.
\n\n\nOnce I heard that news, I knew why I didn’t sleep much Monday night with that weapon two feet from my head. I pulled off the road early, got a campsite, and quit for the day.
\n\n\nVicarious trauma…when the violent events of the world deeply affect those who witness it, read about it, see it and hear it on social media and the news.
\n\n\nIt’s just too much for this mama’s heart.
\n\n\nMay we never become so numb to the ugliness that we don’t fight for a better world. May we not hide our heads in the sand. May we be strong and courageous and stand up for what’s right and protect the innocents among us.
\n\n\nYes…my prayers are with those who suffer needlessly. But it’s time for more than “thoughts and prayers”.
\n\n\nThe time for bandaids is long gone. It’s time for real and lasting change.
\n\n\n❤️?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2022-05-25T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2022/05/25/vicarious-trauma-and-senseless-loss.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Warning","Choices","Change","Anxiety"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2022/03/29/lets-talk-about-anger-and.html", "title": "Let’s Talk About Anger and Redemption", "content_html": "\n“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. But let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or an evildoer or as a meddler. Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name. For it is time for judgment to begin at the household of God; and if it begins with us, what will be the outcome for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And “If the righteous is scarcely saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?” Therefore let those who suffer according to God’s will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good.”
\n1 Peter 4:12-19 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/52e9721765.jpg\")
Jada Pinkett Smith rolls her eyes in response to Chris Rock’s joke about her alopecia. Initially, her husband laughs with the crowd. Then….not so much. Photo Credit: ABC
\n\n\nI have to tell you…I never watch the Academy Awards. I went eight years without a television. Then, after Mr. Virgo died, there was very little that could hold my attention for more than an hour so movies fell off the list, too. Mr. FixIt and I have been together for five years now and I believe we have gone to the theater maybe twice in that time. It’s just not something I do, so the Oscars are a bit of a moot exercise. I don’t know many of the actors and don’t follow their careers.
\n\n\nI was writing my post Sunday night when Mr. FixIt called me into the living room to see something on TV. He was watching the awards ceremony when the infamous “slap heard ‘round the world” played out on the screen. He, like many others, questioned what he was seeing. Was this a joke? Was it scripted? One look at Will Smith’s face when he was shouting at Chris Rock told me this was real.
\n\n\nSocial media lit up with a fervor within moments with hashtags like #whatjusthappened. As best as I can tell by what I’ve read, there were a lot of things at play here and I think they warrant some discussion…not that there hasn’t been plenty, mind you.
\n\n\nFirst and foremost, let me say there is no place for violence…ever. I do not condone that behavior, nor am I excusing it.
\n\n\nJada Pinkett Smith announced in 2018 that she was suffering with alopecia and decided to shave her head. From what I’ve found, she had only one spot of hair loss at the time, located on the crown of her head. As is her prerogative, she took control of the situation, much as chemo patients do who shave their heads before the poison has a chance to make their hair fall out in clumps. I admire that.
\n\n\nAlopecia is an emotionally painful condition. Much of our identity is tied up in our appearance and let’s face it…our hair is right there, front and center. Short of wearing a ball cap, we can’t do much to hide bald patches. I watch people I love struggle with ways to hide hair loss and I wish I could just get them to be brave and take charge and embrace who they are. But, it’s not my head…it’s not my hair.
\n\n\nChris Rock is a comedian. I don’t think he’s very funny. His jokes are crude and vulgar and it’s never a good idea to joke about someone’s medical condition. So, at the get go, this wasn’t going to go well. When he got to Ms. Smith and made a reference to the next GI Jane movie, he was making reference to her alopecia. Not cool. Then…something happened.
\n\n\nThe room laughed. Will Smith laughed. Jada Pinkett Smith did not.
\n\n\nWhat happened here? Obviously Ms. Smith didn’t laugh because the joke was about her. So why did the audience and her husband laugh? There is something called “mob psychology”. Something happens in a crowd setting that may not normally happen with the individuals within that crowd. It has to do with the need to belong, to fit in, to be one of the “in crowd”. It’s why teenagers succumb to peer pressure. And it’s why some law abiding citizens join in on a law breaking event they might never think of doing in any other setting.
\n\n\nThe people in the audience take their social cues from each other. If a handful of people would have booed at the joke, there probably wouldn’t have been the laughter…albeit uncomfortable. So, they laughed. Will laughed. Then he looked at his wife and saw her annoyance and probable hurt. And, as is often the case with toxic masculinity, he went with his first impulse and walked to the stage to strike the errant comedian.
\n\n\nLet me interject a story here. When I was thirteen years old and my brother was fifteen, Mom left us home when she went to work. My brother is differently abled…he has cerebral palsy. I was, and still am his self-appointed protector. I was in the house one day, cleaning up the kitchen and starting supper. I heard a ruckus out back and went to investigate. There was a neighbor boy on the bank, hiding in some bushes, making fun of my brother and his stutter. I was livid.
\n\n\nI slipped out the front door, went up the street and around the back of his house. I snuck up behind him and before he knew what was happening, I kicked him in the seat of his pants and he went tumbling down the bank and into the street. He got up, skinned and bloodied. I shinnied down that bank as fast as I could and stood right up to that bully…nose to nose…and told him if he ever picked on my brother again, he’d look a darned sight worse next time. He ran crying into the house and I went to get my brother and take him inside.
\n\n\nI understand the deep down gut instinct to protect that which is mine. I do. But there is a huge difference between what I did as a thirteen year old and what this grown man did on national television. I understand we hold celebrities to higher standards because they are looked up to by others. I know what he should have done…could have done. He chose to resort to violence and sullied his reputation in the process. I believe he’s contrite for a number of reasons…not the least of which is the repercussions that may come from the Academy itself like the possibility of losing that coveted Oscar. I understand he and Chris have mended their fences already…which smacks of “boys will be boys”.
\n\n\nDid Jada need rescuing? Probably not. She is a pretty strong individual and can hold her own from what I can see. Did the people involved in the movie he was there to represent get their evening ruined? Probably so. It wasn’t the shining moment they were hoping for…that they deserved. Did the attendees get what they came there for? Maybe. Maybe not. That’s not the point of this exercise.
\n\n\nDenzel Washington probably had the most prophetic comment of the night. During the commercial break…after the altercation but before Will’s Oscar win…Denzel said to him “At your highest moment, be careful. That’s when the devil comes for you.” And, isn’t that the truth? When we are at the apogee of our careers…when we are standing in the spotlight of good things…that’s when we are the most vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks.
\n\n\nWill Smith ignored his better angels that night. He did what he thought was right in the emotion of the moment and defended his wife. And what we witnessed was a fall from grace which is a really hard thing to watch. There’s been a lot of that lately…that “falling from grace”. Maybe society at large have been living a little high on the hog and we’re getting dressed down to size. Maybe mob mentality is challenging our better angels to a duel. I don’t know. I do know that violence is never the answer to lasting peace…not in any arena.
\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/480614655b.jpg\")
Lady Gaga, left, and Liza Minnelli present the award for best picture at the Oscars on Sunday, March 27, 2022, at the Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)
\n\n\nWhat we really should focus on were the wonderful firsts that occurred during the night. The best picture win went to an all deaf cast, bringing the deaf community into the spotlight in a mainstream movie that normalizes the characters’ lives, showing them as no different than ourselves. But to me, from what limited clips I saw, the star of the evening was Lady Gaga. She accompanied the aging and frail Liza Minnelli out to present the Oscar for Best Movie. While Ms. Minnelli stumbled a bit, her protégé was calm and gently guided her through the entire process in a way that honored the septuagenarian without infantilizing her. What a wonderful example of respecting our elders. These are the people we should be looking up to and talking about.
\n\n\n?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2022-03-29T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2022/03/29/lets-talk-about-anger-and.html", "tags": ["Anger","Aging","Choices","Control"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2021/08/16/please-dont-feed-the-trolls.html", "title": "Please Don’t Feed the Trolls", "content_html": "\n“Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.”
\nMatthew 23:12 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/a3c568af31.jpg\")
When you own a website or blog, you open yourself up to a lot of good things. And, as they say… “Into each life, a little rain must fall.” It’s unavoidable. I know full well, when I touch on controversial subjects, I’m liable to get some pushback. It comes with the turf. I don’t mind hearing other’s opinions, of course…as long as there is an attempt at civil discourse. I seldom delete a post, and I rarely need to block someone. But, it happened yesterday so I thought perhaps we should discuss it.
\n\n\nAccording to my statistics on this page, my demographic is largely women aged 60 and over…not unexpected since my writing covers grief, faith, aging, health, cooking, family, retirement, farm life, and….well, you get it. You’ve been reading me long enough to know what I do here. It occurred to me yesterday, women in this demographic may not know how to spot a troll on social media…or even know what that is.
\n\n\nThere is a difference between a troll and someone merely disagreeing with something you’ve said and expressing themselves. It isn’t always easy to tell them apart…especially when things get heated. I get a notification every time someone likes or comments on my posts here…the “launch pad” to my website. I try to at least acknowledge every interaction on my page because I like staying engaged with you all. Most of the time you get a ? and sometimes you get a written response…it depends on the subject and how much time I have that day. At any rate, I like for you to know I’m seeing what you write to me and I deeply appreciate you.
\n\n\nYesterday, I broke my own rule. I unknowingly fed a troll and things started escalating. In my defense, I was out on the mower at the end of the far field. I stopped to take a drink and I felt my phone vibrate. I took a quick look and saw some heat and stepped in with what I hoped was a calming response. By the time I was finished mowing, it was obvious I should have taken the time to look into the person making the comments.
\n\n\nThere were several red flags. First, it wasn’t a name I recognized…I had never seen a comment from this person before. And, second…she got personal, fast. Attacking not only me, but other readers. I honestly didn’t take the time to do any research. I have zero tolerance for personal attacks so I removed the ugly posts and blocked the person. Later, in order to make sure I did the right thing, I asked a friend to look this person up and check on two things…when she joined Facebook and how many friends she had. It wasn’t two minutes later when I got the confirmation I needed. New account. No friends. That’s what I should have done first before I ever responded….look her up to confirm.
\n\n\nTrolls and troll accounts can come from a variety of sources. Sometimes it’s nothing more than cyber bullies…anonymous accounts someone hides behind in order to attack and provoke a response from either the owner of the page or their friends/readers/customers. The attacks are usually focused around hot topics and they are meant to trigger people into responding out of anger. This type of troll gets a kick out of the drama and angry responses and will continue to escalate with every response…often getting personal. They’ll send laughing emojis when you respond with anger. They belittle and demean. And they have a hunger to be fed. If you ignore them, sometimes they give up and go away on their own because they aren’t getting what they want. That’s easier to do when it’s just you responding on your own page. It’s an entirely different situation when you have over 6,000 readers on a blog.
\n\n\nAnother kind of troll is what we saw starting in about 2014. Russian Intelligence discovered the United States would be far easier to defeat if they divided us and pitted us against each other. So they went on a massive disinformation campaign to do just that and drew the line in the sand between political parties. This continued during the campaign for the 2016 Presidential election…the fallout of which we will be dealing with for God knows how long. I am sure it continues today as foreign powers jump on the bandwagon, reach into our computers, and stir up a hornet’s nest.They have learned they can destroy us without firing a shot. All they have to do is poke the bear, point the finger at the other guy saying, “He did it!” Then, they sit back and laugh at how easy it was.
\n\n\nRecognizing a cyber bully is easier than recognizing a troll account created by a foreign power. The trick is to stop and think before you respond. Have a peek at the person’s personal FB page. The biggest clue is “no friends” or a really new account. They rant. They pick trigger topics and gauge the audience to actually decide which side of the fence to stand on. They may not even believe in what they’re spewing…they’re just in it for the high of the response.
\n\n\nClemson University created a questionnaire to try to help you figure out who is legit and who is a troll. You can find it HERE. I’m pretty savvy to this issue because I’ve been writing this blog for over eight years now. I got 7 out of 8 right on Spot the Troll. It’s not easy to apply critical thinking skills when you’re in the heat of the moment. So, before you start throwing barbs back, take a breath and do a little research. It’ll be better for your blood pressure.
\n\n\nWe’re all in this together. Let’s try to educate each other and outsmart the fox that’s somehow gotten into our henhouse.
\n\n\n?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2021-08-16T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2021/08/16/please-dont-feed-the-trolls.html", "tags": ["Growth","Wisdom","Anger","Writing","Choices","Change","Insight"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2021/08/13/its-the-dog-days-of.html", "title": "It’s the Dog Days of Summer", "content_html": "\n“There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.”
\nProverbs 6:16-19 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/353d79ffa9.jpg\")
The Mystery Flower: Sun Star? Star of Bethlehem? Some kind of lily?
\n\n\nI am hoping against hope that yesterday was the hottest day of our summer here in West Virginia. When they tell you it’s not the heat, it’s the humidity…that’s pretty much true. The thermometer on the back of our house registered 103 at 4:00. Granted…that’s on a red brick wall on the west side of the house, but it’s under the eaves and out of direct sunlight. The humidity was only 63% but it felt like a sauna out there.
\n\n\nMr. FixIt went to town to help a friend price some antiques before his yard sale this weekend, so I stayed home in the air conditioning and finished up the plans for our trip to Colorado. I found some really great places to camp and didn’t have a bit of trouble finding available campsites. That’s the beauty of camping in September and October…the kids are back in school and summer vacations are all but over.
\n\n\nAs the sun began to slip toward the horizon, I went outside and took some pictures of this mystery plant that was here when I came onto the scene. Remember I told you it was all but dead in the basement and I emptied the two planters into a washtub along the fence? Well, they’ve gone crazy and now they’re blooming. The tallest blossom is as high as the fence! I ran a picture of it through a plant identification app on my phone (PictureThis) and it says it’s a Sun Star…otherwise known as a Star of Bethlehem. I’m not totally convinced, but it might be. Anyway, the flowers are beautiful. The plant is hardy. But, you do need to dig up the bulbs and store them in the basement over the winter.
\n\n\nI walked around the property as it got dark and suddenly, I started seeing movement out of the corner of my eye. I looked up and there were bats swooping down all around me and that kinda freaked me out a little so I headed back to the pool where Mr. FixIt was sweeping and cleaning. All this hot weather has really made the algae go nuts so we need to get after it with some chemicals today. He asked me to go turn off the pump so I could back flush it. Well, as soon as I tried to turn it off, the switch broke right off! I was reaching the end of my rope by this point. It was still in the 90’s, I was sweating buckets, I was being chased by bats, and now I’d broken the pump switch.
\n\n\nIt was getting pretty dark. I went in and got the head lamp and Mr. FixIt handed me a flathead screwdriver. I unplugged the pump, got down on the ground and managed to flip the switch back to the on position. When we plugged it back in, it turned right on. By this time, we had a hose running in the pool to bring the water level back up. We have had no rain to speak of in weeks and between that and all the back flushing, we were running pretty low.
\n\n\nI sat down on the deck. I could feel the sweat running down my cheeks and made a decision…it was time to turn off the lights and go skinny dipping! There is nothing more wonderful than slipping into cool water when the world feels like an oven and it’s making you act just plain nasty. My dear friends Janine Pettit and Lesa McDermott just finished rafting the length of the Grand Canyon. It was 114 degrees every day. The nights got all the way down to 99 and they slept with wet towels over themselves to try to cool down. I cannot imagine that kind of heat. That was an incredible life experience…one they were both glad they did with twenty other Girl Campers. But, they neither one have a desire to do it again.
\n\n\nAnyway, the pool felt wonderful and it was like that candy bar commercial where the grumpy guy turns nice again once his sugar level comes back up. I could feel my shoulders relax and the tension leave my body. Mr. FixIt and I floated around and talked about the stars and the Colorado trip and the news of the day. We watched the heat lightning off in the distance. Soon we were friends again and laughing.
\n\n\nIt’s important to feed each other in life. To look out for each other. To fight fair. To talk nice. When you fall short…you say “I’m sorry”. Marriage shouldn’t be “hard work”. Like all things, living and loving can challenge us. The challenge is loving and forgiving and trusting with a great big sense of humor. It’s easy to get grumpy when the weather is hot and sticky and things break. So, take my advice…turn off the lights, drop your drawers, and jump in the water!
\n\n\nStay cool, dear ones!
\n\n\n?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2021-08-13T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2021/08/13/its-the-dog-days-of.html", "tags": ["Love","Wisdom","Anger","Forgiveness","Aging","Kindness","Marriage"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2021/03/24/when-thoughts-and-prayers-are.html", "title": "When “Thoughts and Prayers” are Not Enough", "content_html": "\n“While the earth remains, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night, shall not cease.””
\nGenesis 8:22 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/01d90f3d6b.jpg\")
I don’t want to make this a political issue. I want to make it a human issue. I don’t want the government to come take all the guns and destroy them. I don’t know how they could possibly do that, anyway. There’s way too many of them. But there is one thing that is perfectly clear to me.
\n\n\nWe have to do something.
\n\n\nThe King Soopers shooter was born three days before the Columbine shooting. Twenty-one years ago. How many have there been since then? Yeah...I know. A lot less than car accidents and heart attacks and cancer and Covid. I get that. But, this is supposed to be a civilized society.
\n\n\nAfter living in Colorado for forty years, and as a mother and grandmother and sister and friend of Colorado residents...my heart was in my throat when I heard “King Soopers Shooter” and “Colorado” in the same sentence. Where are my kids? My grandchildren? My friends? When they said the shooting was in Boulder, I had one second of relief. Then I was drawn back to the thought of all this unimaginable loss. My heart squeezed tight thinking of the shoppers that witnessed the shooting. The family members with the knock on the door.
\n\n\nThe inevitable “I’m so sorry”.
\n\n\nThen I got angry. I felt like he’d messed with MY people...MY state...MY home. I wanted to scream....
\n\n\n“Stop it! Just STOP!!!”
\n\n\nWe have to DO something.
\n\n\nBut what? Sensible gun control? Register ammunition? Draw and quarter mass shooters in the village square? It appears from early statements there may be mental illness at play in this case...although, how can you say anyone who commits such an atrocity is sane? At the very least...make it more difficult to get a lethal weapon. Hell, I had to sign a contract with my doctor to have regular appointments to monitor my use of anxiety medication. But, I could go out tomorrow and buy an AR-15???
\n\n\nHow long can we sit in our comfortable homes with our families around us and “send our thoughts and prayers” for these innocent victims and their families? It seems such empty rhetoric. The easy way out.
\n\n\nThe families of every victim of gun violence need so much more than our thoughts and prayers.
\n\n\nWhen is enough going to really BE enough?
\n\n\nPlease....please...just make it STOP.
\n\n\nSending thoughts and prayers then moving on the next week isn’t cutting it anymore.
\n\n\nWE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING...NOW!!!
\n\n\n? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2021-03-24T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2021/03/24/when-thoughts-and-prayers-are.html", "tags": ["Colorado","Grief","Anger","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/08/15/day-just-an-old-granny.html", "title": "Day 150: Just an Old Granny Grump", "content_html": "\n“Then Jesus said to him, “Put your sword back into its place. For all who take the sword will perish by the sword.”
\nMatthew 26:52 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/0787be43d1.jpg\")
When my grandma got old and we’d ask her how she was doing, she’d say, “I’m just an old Granny Grump!” I have no idea how old “old” was to me at the time, and I surely didn’t grasp the full nuance of the term “Granny Grump”. But, I think I’m beginning to get it.
\n\n\nOk...I’m not old, but I’m feeling like it lately. And I’m definitely feeling grumpy. Just ask my poor husband. It’s hard when you go on Facebook and you see your friends out doing things and you aren’t. It makes you wonder if maybe you’re being silly with all these Covid precautions. I mean, really...what harm could it do to hop on a plane or hook up the camper and drive across the country? I want to go camping. I want to go out to dinner. I want to go to Daytona Beach.
\n\n\nI want my life back.
\n\n\nI know. You do, too.
\n\n\nThis isn’t easy. And getting ready to head into the winter months, feeling like this will never ever end can easily turn anyone into a Granny Grump. When we got home from town yesterday, I hopped on the mower and mowed the whole property. I can do a lot of thinking while I mow. I zipped past the camper and thought, “I could do it, you know. I could just pack that bad girl up and hit the open road and be in Colorado by the middle of next week!!!” Man, I miss my kids and grandkids and brother and friends. Mr. FixIt and I have been together more in the last 150 days than Mr. Virgo and I were in the entire seven years I knew him. I’ve never spent this much time with anyone and being the kind of person I am...I know full well I am much NICER when I have a little tiny bit of space to call my own.
\n\n\nThen I remember how awful it was when I found out what being really alone felt like. And I start feeling a little guilty about wanting some space. Because I know about grief and loss and aloneness. And...being careful what you wish for.
\n\n\nThere is a difference between wanting to be alone and wanting a little space and time to recharge. Thank God, Mr. FixIt is pretty much back to being his healthy self. I still wouldn’t feel comfortable pulling the camper all the way to Colorado without him this summer, though. That’s too far away and not enough time has passed since the strokes. Then there’s the whole virus thing...so, here I am.
\n\n\nI’m just feeling a little stuck. And, I know I’m not the only one.
\n\n\nThis is a tough time we are going through, considering everything that has happened this year. I am reminded of something I wrote about a long time ago. You can put an egg and a potato in boiling water. One will become hard. The other soft. The temperature of the water is the same, but what they turn into depends on what they are made of.
\n\n\nI will not let my present set of circumstances harden me.
\n\n\nThis, too, shall pass.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n“If you are a husband, you should be thoughtful of your wife. Treat her with honor, because she isn't as strong as you are, and she shares with you in the gift of life. Then nothing will stand in the way of your prayers.”
\n1 Peter 3:7 CEV\n
#JustSayin, #Grumpy, #Stuck
\n\n", "date_published": "2020-08-15T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/08/15/day-just-an-old-granny.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Positive Energy","Gratitude","Comfort","Grace","Love","Peace","Anger","Forgiveness","Choices","Marriage"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/08/09/day-into-the-woods-i.html", "title": "Day 144: Into the Woods I Wish I Could Go", "content_html": "\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/e3a749fe5b.jpg\")
I told Mr. FixIt yesterday that I want to go camping...right now. And I don’t want to come back till February. I don’t want a TV or a radio. I don’t want the Internet. I want my iPad and the ability to write and post essays to my blog everyday. But I don’t want anything else but peace.
\n\n\nI simply must find a way to stop getting sucked into the stories that upset me. I read an article warning against “doom-surfing”...getting on the internet and reading one bad thing after another till you’ve gone so far down the rabbit hole, it’s hard to find your way back. I tell myself, I’m being a concerned citizen. That I need to remain informed on current affairs. And, overall that is true. But, where I fall off the wagon is reading all the drama surrounding it.
\n\n\nI have sworn I won’t rant about politics on my page. Then, I wake up and look at my phone and see a trigger story. Before I know it, I’ve shot off my mouth and I haven’t even had coffee yet. I have a wonderful reader/friend who has been around the entire time I’ve been writing this blog. We have become good friends and have had lunch together when we were both visiting Denver. She commented so delicately...just one sentence...and it snapped me out of it. I wrote her a private message and thanked her for throwing me a line.
\n\n\nThere are lots of things I can do to improve this world, but ranting on Facebook isn’t one of them. It gives people the wrong idea of the kind of person I am. And face it...do you really think that off-the-charts meltdown you’re having on social media is going to change anyone’s minds of you?
\n\n\nI have seen some responses from people on my side of the fence and I cringe when I read them. I mean, I totally understand where they’re coming from, but I cringe, nonetheless. The last couple of days, I’ve been trying to really cut back on “doom-surfing”. I look at this picture and really, really wish we were there...away from all this angst.
\n\n\nSince it’s impossible to go live on a mountaintop till February, I’m going to have to come up with diversionary tactics. I’m going to start setting a timer when I get on the internet and stop looking when the time is up. So far, that app that tells me how long I surf online has done nothing but shame me for wasting so much time. Perhaps a timer will be more useful.
\n\n\nI did get a couple new baking books. I’m returning one because I didn’t realize when I ordered it that’s it’s for professionals working in bakeries and restaurants. The recipes make huge amounts and it’s just the two of us. (Although, I did send a loaf of sourdough bread to Daughter #1 for their wedding anniversary dinner.) I have mastered sourdough. Now I think I’ll try baking a nice brioche.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2020-08-09T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/08/09/day-into-the-woods-i.html", "tags": ["Hope","Anger","Forgiveness","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/08/01/day-its-all-in-the.html", "title": "Day 136: It’s All in the Tone", "content_html": "\n“He was painfully abused, but he did not complain. He was silent like a lamb being led to the butcher, as quiet as a sheep having its wool cut off.”
\nIsaiah 53:7 CEV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/4c68c8abb5.jpg\")
I was an absolute a$$ this week to one of my dearest friends in the world. She and I live on pretty opposite ends of the political spectrum and I usually do a decent job of keeping myself in check. But something in me snapped this week and I went way over my line in the sand and I knew I had hurt her. She went quiet. She didn’t open my texts. I realized I had put “being right” over “being smart”. Over “being kind”.
\n\n\nIt does absolutely no good to scream at others over your differences. And, while I didn’t think I was “screaming”, I forgot that tone is everything with the written word. I was struck by something President Bush said at Senator John Lewis’ funeral: “Listen, John and I had our disagreements of course - but in the America John Lewis fought for, and the America I believe in, differences of opinion are inevitable elements and evidence of democracy in action.”
\n\n\nIt takes a great deal of insight to recognize when you have crossed a boundary, and it takes courage and humility to ask forgiveness for your transgressions. I am not sorry for having my own ideas of what I feel is right. But I AM sorry for acting as though MY ideas should be everyone else’s ideas, too. The world isn’t black and white. We all believe in things through the lens of who we are, where we’ve been, what we’ve seen, and how we want the world to be.
\n\n\nI was relieved when my friend accepted my apology and we again expressed our love for each other. Does that mean we cannot have lively debate with others who disagree with us? No, of course not. But it DOES mean we are all God’s children and he loves us equally. We should pray as much for our own understanding as we do for the understanding of others. We can disagree and still come from a place of human decency and loving kindness.
\n\n\nRespect helps your ideas go a lot further than standing on a bully pulpit.
\n\n\nI so needed a break from all this daily angst online and in the news. When we woke up yesterday morning, Mr. FixIt asked what I wanted to do with my day and I said I wanted to drive up to Kidron, Ohio and check out Lehman’s Hardware. I’ve been drooling over their catalogs for years and it seemed like the perfect escape.
\n\n\nWe grabbed coffee at the drive through and drove the two-and-a-half hours north. OMGosh! That place is the Smithsonian of hardware stores. Honestly, it would take several days of browsing (without the hubby) to take it all in. Building after building are connected with each one housing yet another genre of goodies to behold. I made a bee line for the kitchen area and honestly, I saw very little of the rest of the store.
\n\n\nI picked up some wonderful things for the kitchen. We needed a new pizza cutter. Ours broke over a year ago. I got one of those gadgets that cut the corn from the ear. I needed a new Foley Food Mill for separating the seeds and skins from the tomatoes when I can them. I lost mine in the downsizing, I think. I found a great springform pan with a glass bottom for making cheesecakes. I also found a skimmer with a very fine screen for getting the foam off the top of jelly before I put it in the jars. It will double as a fine sifter for putting rice flour on my sourdough loaves before I score them.
\n\n\nLet’s see...I got Lehman’s 65th Year recipe book that I can hardly wait to read. I found the perfect canning ladle. And, I got a little gizmo for making very small batches of homemade butter. Homemade butter doesn’t last quite as long as the kind you buy in the store and it’s not always easy to make up very small batches. This may be one of those gadgets that look like a better idea in the store than it actually does in the kitchen, but we shall see.
\n\n\nWhen we got home, I felt like I had been away for a week. And the very best part is, I didn’t spend so much time on the internet or Facebook and it gave me a much better outlook and attitude. And, my friendship is still intact without compromising my ideals. It was a very restorative and very humbling day. We need those from time to time.
\n\n\nIt is a new month...another new start.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2020-08-01T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/08/01/day-its-all-in-the.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Growth","Anger","Fear","Forgiveness","Humbled","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/04/18/day-the-transmogrification-of-the.html", "title": "Day 33: The Transmogrification of the World", "content_html": "\n“If I have to brag, I will brag about how weak I am.”
\n2 Corinthians 11:30 CEV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/b63c5f7821.jpg\")
You can ask anyone who knows me...especially my sweet hubby...CHANGE is my middle name. I can roll with the punches like the best of them. I can adapt, adjust, regroup, reform, revise, diversify, shift, twist, transform, remodel, and steer in a whole new direction. I’ve made myself over so many times, I am unrecognizable to those who’ve known me longest. But there comes a point where it gets “purt near impossible” as my grandma used to say...even for a flexible person like me.
\n\n\nI can handle when things slow down. I can take it when certain items are unavailable. After all, I lived through the great gasoline, toilet paper and sugar shortage of 1973-74 in the UK. We were actually given ration coupons. I hate that this disease is causing so much hardship on the world. It breaks my heart the amount of death that lies in its wake.
\n\n\nThe first time I ever faced the visual shock of devastating change was in the late ‘80s, early ‘90s. I was on my annual trip to West Virginia to visit my family. I always stayed at the farm as much as possible when I went home and no trip was complete without a hike back up on the hill to the old Strawberry Shed. At this time, I could still walk up the trail behind the barn and walk through the woods. Now, old trees have long since fallen up the holler and blocked any way to get up through there, let alone finding the path since it’s overgrown.
\n\n\nThat one particular summer, I hiked back up on the hill and when I came out into the clearing where the old garden was, I dropped to my knees in disbelief. The woods were gone. Just...gone! They had been clear cut and nothing was left but stumps. Something inside me felt broken and I cried my heart out. Someone had killed my childhood memories and I felt violated.
\n\n\nNo one told me about the woods. No one warned me what the change would look like or that I should prepare myself. For them, it was a matter of course. Wood is a commodity on a farm and when you need to build a building or you need some money to live on, you make a withdrawal out of the “Bank of Nature” and cash it in. I knew this in my logical brain, but my emotional brain was devastated.
\n\n\nLast fall, my dear friend Gail told us our beloved Beaver Creek State Park was going to close soon after our “What a Hoot” event with the Girl Campers. She said they were going to cut out some dead wood, thin out the woods to improve the forest health, and mitigate a couple of old holding ponds leftover from the days when the area was a strip mine. The plan was to fill in those two pits and cut some of the far trees so you could once again look down over the edge to see the Pioneer Village below.
\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/a4eec22fdf.jpg\")
That sounded good. A healthy move. A needed change. It would promote healthy new growth and cut down on the terrible mosquito problem that infested the area in late summer. I haven’t been back up there yet. The state park is still closed for rehab. And, the pandemic has kept us from camping yet. Then, I saw the first photos from the park and I was once again hit in the gut with that familiar pain from such a visual change.
\n\n\nThe trees are just...gone. It looks like all of them, from what I can see. What was once magical is now just a memory. We can only hope that what is there will become beautiful again, but it won’t be in our lifetime. The changes we are seeing from the pandemic may also be far reaching. Many are unimaginable and hit us in the gut. Things are different. And more change will come. And some of it will be downright ugly and frightening, but....at the same time...
\n\n\nThe birds will sing.
\n\n\nThe sun will rise and set.
\n\n\nThe seasons will change.
\n\n\nBabies will come.
\n\n\nElders will go.
\n\n\nThe water will flow from the peaks of the mountains to the valleys below.
\n\n\nThere will be fires and storms and earthquakes and disease.
\n\n\nAnd there will be life.
\n\n\nResilient, strong, adaptable people will persevere. We may not live long enough to see how it all plays out but we can rest assured of one thing...
\n\n\nNo matter what is thrown at us in this life, we know the end of the story and good triumphs over evil.
\n\n\nIt is finished. We just haven’t seen the end of it yet.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2020-04-18T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/04/18/day-the-transmogrification-of-the.html", "tags": ["Grief","Overcoming Obstacles","West Virginia","The Farm","Anger","Courage","Aging","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/03/17/how-a-national-emergency-has.html", "title": "How a National Emergency has Changed our Lives", "content_html": "\n“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
\nJeremiah 29:11 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/3d807f85d4.jpg\")
Day One:
\n\n\nSlept in.
\n\n\nRead Bible Study, E-mails, FB, and checked blog.
\n\n\nChecked the weather and news online.
\n\n\nHad coffee and breakfast with Mr. FixIt.
\n\n\nWatched two game shows.
\n\n\nRan to town to get milk & stuff for burgers for dinner. (Hardly anyone in the store. Well stocked.)
\n\n\nDrove to mechanic to check on my truck and get my gun case to bring home.
\n\n\nGot money out of ATM.
\n\n\nVisited with granddaughter and greatgrands.
\n\n\nTook the stitches out of the cat and let her run.
\n\n\nAte a snack.
\n\n\nTook a nap.
\n\n\nFixed supper.
\n\n\nWatched The Voice.
\n\n\nRetired to bedroom to write blog.
\n\n\nIn other words...the national emergency didn’t change much of anything. Yeah, maybe we shouldn’t have visited with the kids, but they haven’t been anywhere but home because she’s a stay-at-home mom with two babies. At this point though...we have no plans for any kind of gathering...large or small.
\n\n\nAfter much discussion, we decided to cancel Girl Camper Camper College this weekend. None of us wanted to, but it was the prudent thing to do. We will gather later when things settle back down.
\n\n\nMy shout out today is to the grocery store workers. When there were crazed crowds fighting over bundles of toilet paper, the workers kept their cool and plugged right along. Even when they were being yelled at for something that is FAR above their pay grade. I’ve seen videos of people fighting over toilet paper and seen customers screaming at grocery clerks and telling them they hope they die from coronavirus.
\n\n\nHere’s something I have learned from years of therapy. There is a very fine line between anger and fear. People jump into herd mentality, their fear begins to amp, they fight for what they perceive they need...in this case toilet paper. Their reptilian brain is telling them they have to be the alpha dog if they’re going to survive. So they grab the rolls of TP from the little old lady and shove it in their already over-filled cart. Angry. Spit flying. Over toilet paper.
\n\n\nThat kind of anger comes from fear. I’ve seen it over and over in my time. Fear comes from being out of control and ill prepared.
\n\n\nI talked to the kids yesterday. I shared what a wonderful opportunity this is to do something amazing that can change the world. This couldn’t have come at a better time. We were beginning to forget what it was really like to be a good human.
\n\n\nLet’s do that...let’s be good humans.
\n\n\nAnd remember how sweet it feels when we get to do that first thing we didn’t get to do for a while.
\n\n\nMay we learn to appreciate what we have.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2020-03-17T01:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/03/17/how-a-national-emergency-has.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Growth","Gratitude","Grace","Anger","Forgiveness","Courage","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/03/07/theres-poorand-then-theres-poverty.html", "title": "There’s Poor...and Then There’s Poverty", "content_html": "\n“Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in preaching and teaching.”
\n1 Timothy 5:17 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/1c417d8c3f.jpg\")
When I say we were poor growing up, compared to others we were doing just fine. Sure, we ate a lot of food from Grandma’s garden in the summers and took the canned jars home that she offered us. We had to make a pound of hamburger feed four...two of them male with hearty appetites. And my dad used to grow a garden on the empty lot out behind our house. I remember we would get half a beef and eat from the freezer for a year. We didn’t have a lot of extras, and we lived in a small, modest house in a clean, safe neighborhood...so we were actually pretty golden.
\n\n\nIt wasn’t like my mom’s upbringing out on the farm in the post-depression poverty of the 1930’s. Grandma once told me, if it hadn’t been for the cow, her family of eight would have starved to death. They grew and canned their own food, had a cow and a couple of pigs, and grew a patch of sorghum for their only sweet...molasses. It was a hard life. Still, five out of the six went to college.
\n\n\nWhen I left West Virginia in 1973, I was a newlywed and just graduated from x-ray school. I headed out into the world with great hopes and joined my husband in England where he was stationed with the Air Force. I couldn’t work overseas without going back to school and we wouldn’t be stationed there long enough to even finish. So, we had a baby instead.
\n\n\nLiving life in the military in the ‘70s wasn’t too bad when you were overseas because you got a stipend for living in a foreign country. When we got back home, though...that was a different story. We were stationed in Colorado where the cost of living has always been higher. We were lucky to get an apartment through HUD housing. It was brand new...had never been lived in. I felt like we were living high on the hog...even when we had nothing more than the barest essentials.
\n\n\nWhen Hubby #1 and I separated, I was still in HUD housing. The only difference was, I started receiving WIC and Food Stamps to supplement the small part-time job. It was hard to get a job when you haven’t worked in your chosen career since school and it’s been two years. I was lucky to find that one.
\n\n\nEventually, things improved. I moved up in my career field, made more money, moved in with a friend and shared expenses. I remarried when Daughter #1 was five years old and Hubby #2 was in medical school. We struggled to make ends meet as I supported us while he was in school. We struggled as he joined his first practice. And then, things got much, much better and we didn’t struggle anymore.
\n\n\nI know I’ve been blessed by that union in many ways. It gave me Daughter #2 and it gave me the ability to buy a house when the marriage ended. When Mr. Virgo came along five years later, we joined our households and life was very good. I haven’t had to make a choice between medicine and food. I lived in a camper for three years after Mr. Virgo died because I WANTED to...not because I HAD to. There’s a big difference there.
\n\n\nOnce I settled back in West Virginia, I saw much more poverty than I remembered growing up. I know ours is not the only state, but there are places here in this beautiful state that are struggling like third world countries struggle. My friend Diane sent me a video tonight that broke my heart. A single mom, trying to raise her kids in WV and what she has to do to bare get by. You can see the video HERE. She is articulate and on point and I think she should run for State Delegate and help fix this.
\n\n\nUnfortunately, poverty is the only “trickle down economics” that is demonstrable. It’s a family disease that gets handed down through the generations and it’s extremely hard to break out of the poverty cycle. I’ve seen it in my own extended family. It’s not the same world where Grandma fed her family with a cow and a garden. There’s an ever widening chasm between the haves and the have nots and it’s our children’s children who will pay the biggest price for it.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2020-03-07T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/03/07/theres-poorand-then-theres-poverty.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Fear","Courage","Humbled","Warning","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2020/02/29/when-you-know-its-time.html", "title": "When You Know It’s Time", "content_html": "\n“\"If your brother becomes poor and cannot maintain himself with you, you shall support him as though he were a stranger and a sojourner, and he shall live with you. Take no interest from him or profit, but fear your God, that your brother may live beside you. You shall not lend him your money at interest, nor give him your food for profit.”
\nLeviticus 25:35-37 ESV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/56ffbd47e2.jpg\")
She grew up poor as a church mouse but didn’t know it. She took in every stray cat there was within a country mile. She fiercely protected her brother with the stutter and the lazy eye. She walked a mile to catch the bus for the 40 mile round trip to school. She got a college education because that’s what her parents insisted of all of their kids...poor or not.
\n\n\nWhen she got her teaching degree, she moved to San Diego...alone. She worked in Cleveland when there were still separate drinking fountains that said “Colored” on them. She never understood why. She married a tall, handsome young man and they lived in Washington, DC. She worked in the first Head Start program.
\n\n\nShe was bright, neatly dressed, incredibly vain about her weight. When her husband’s heart forced him to retire early, they bought his grandparent’s farm and she worked in the country school down the road. She never had children of her own. She said she had 30 new children every year...she didn’t need more.
\n\n\nWhen her husband died unexpectedly in the middle of the night, she was stymied that she was so educated but had no idea how to perform CPR. And he was gone. In typical fashion, she pulled up her bootstraps and carried on. Two years later, she was having lunch at the country club when she caught the eye of the handsome man across the room.
\n\n\nShe soon married the hospital administrator and settled over on his farm not too far away. He didn’t really want her to work. He liked having her around. He loved to fish in Canada in places you could only access by plane. He sold his cattle every year to pay for the charter that took them to remote lakes. She was disciplined and exacting and so in love with this tall, dark man.
\n\n\nHe found out his cancer was back in the spring of 1990. He wasn’t up for the fight again. He figured his number was up and he’d see how it played out. By August, he was gone. When you spoke to her about him, she would get wistful and her eyes would get misty. She said she wished she could have met him first. He was the love of her life. Once they buried him, she never went back.
\n\n\nA few months later, she moved over to her mother’s farm to care for her and that same brother she had fought to protect when they were children. She was the kind of woman who was used to giving the orders. When she said jump, people jumped and asked how far on the way up. She wasn’t up for small talk. She was an incredibly hard worker. She once painted the entire country church...inside and out...by herself. Because there was a young couple getting married.
\n\n\nHer mom passed and she stayed on to care for her brother till he, too, died peacefully in his sleep while she was upstairs reading. That one nearly broke her. She had been his champion. She had cared for everyone. And now, for the first time in her life, she was truly alone. She stayed in her mother’s home, living a simple frugal life. The weeks turned into years. She found herself staring down the abyss her life had become. Yet she didn’t move. Finally, it became apparent she was nearing that point she was going to need help herself.
\n\n\nThat’s where I come in.
\n\n\nShe’s my aunt. The one I left Colorado to come help. She and I were oil and water. I knew that. But she had no children...no one to come help. And she had done so much for everyone, I felt an obligation to be there for her. For those of you who followed me at the time, you know how it went down. It was great for the first month. I worked hard on the farm...cutting and hauling brush, cleaning and fixing up the house. I did the laundry and shopping and cooking. Then winter set in.
\n\n\nWe are both strong, independent women. And it wasn’t long till we were standing on each other’s very last nerve. She unceremoniously invited me to leave at Christmas and that set me out on another couple of years on the road with my camper. While I was living at the farm, we had a talk one day about nursing homes. She said, when she felt it was time, she would just pack up her bag and go over to the Minnie Hamilton Clinic and sign herself in. I had to explain to her that wasn’t how it worked. You had to be on a waiting list.
\n\n\nThree years ago, my aunt got so bad she couldn’t live alone anymore. Her brother came and took her home with him and I came off the road to live on the farm. My uncle was already taking care of his wife with dementia when my aunt began to slip into her own. His wife passed the day after Mr. FixIt and I got married. He has faithfully cared for his sister all this time, but it’s taking it’s toll and they had the talk.
\n\n\nIn a lucid moment, she agreed it was time to go. She has recently been diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. She’s eighty-eight. Even though she loses herself more often, she still knew it was time.
\n\n\nWhen she and I were doing that dance on the farm, we didn’t know she was slipping into dementia. I’ve never known someone in the early stages. It can look like something completely different. We had always butted heads. But she lost her filter and I took it personally. I learned a lot from that experience. I gained a level of empathy and an appreciation for the power of confusion.
\n\n\nSo, now she’s going to need to settle in. She did well the first night. The next morning the doctor woke her up and she attacked him with her walker. She’s a pistol alright. When they asked her if she wanted to be resuscitated, she got right up in their faces and said, “No way...I just want to waltz my way out of here all natural like.”
\n\n\nI have no doubt she will.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2020-02-29T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2020/02/29/when-you-know-its-time.html", "tags": ["Anger","Aging","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2019/12/28/beware-of-the-scam.html", "title": "Beware of the Scam", "content_html": "\n“Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.””
\nJames 4:14-15 NIV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/2b2b3c82ed.jpg\")
Mr. FixIt and I were watching a movie Christmas night when I received a notification from PayPal on my phone. My domain fee for my website was due. I thought back over the time frame when I built the website and it was over the Christmas holiday. When I opened the invoice, it had the GoDaddy logo and the date, amount due, and my domain name. All official looking. I must admit, I was distracted by the movie. And, the thought that it was odd coming in on Christmas Day had barely registered when I determined it was legit and hit “pay”.
\n\n\nThen the receipt came and it was to a Russian name!
\n\n\nUgh...it only took one second to realize I had just been scammed. I could have spit nails. I know better. If I would have just thought it through and asked myself questions like, “Why would they be requesting money through PayPal?” Ahhhh, but that’s water under the bridge now, isn’t it?
\n\n\nI immediately went on GoDaddy’s website and found their chat feature so I could speak to a representative. He walked me though the whole thing and confirmed my suspicions...the invoice did NOT come from them. I contacted PayPal and filed a fraud report. I got on my bank’s website and sent an urgent message to the fraud department. But it was Christmas Day, after all. Not much I could do until the bank opened the next day.
\n\n\nAs soon as they opened, I was on the phone with them. They emailed a form I needed to sign because it came from the account directly and not through a card. If it had, they would have sent me a new card. Since it did not, I had to print the form, sign it, take a photo of it and sent it back to the bank. We do not have a working printer at the house, so I drove to town to the library.
\n\n\nOnce that was finished, I did my grocery shopping and came back home. I received a message from PayPal that said they couldn’t find any fraud because I had ok’d the payment myself. I called them and finally got a live human being and they reopened their inquiry. In the meantime, they emailed the Russian to hear his side of the story. Yeah...like THAT’S going to get them anywhere! Anyway, I’ve banked at the same bank since 1986 and they jump through hoops to make sure you’re well taken care of. Either way, I’ll get my $51 back. I’m just really lucky it wasn’t any worse.
\n\n\nIf you find yourself in just such a mess, the first thing you need to do is change your password and security questions on whatever site they got in through. That stopped them in their tracks. It’s just really frustrating, but at least I didn’t have to close my checking account and start a new one, or change cards. Be careful out there...especially at this time of year!
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n“Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.”
\n\n\nEphesians 4:28 NIV
\n\n", "date_published": "2019-12-28T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2019/12/28/beware-of-the-scam.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Wisdom","Anger","Warning","Widow"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2019/08/09/the-dmv-me.html", "title": "The DMV \u0026 Me", "content_html": "![\"The](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/f960f580b6.jpg\")
“Take my advice…bring chocolate next time you go to the DMV!”
How many vacations have you ridden along with me…vicariously? If you’ve been around very long, you’ll know I don’t do very well with “re-entry”. I’ve never just come home and smoothly transition into laundry and cooking and doing the everyday mundane things. And, it seems the older I get, the more difficult it is to come down off the high of a really good trip. And this one was a REALLY good one.
\nThere were a few little bobbles along the way. The whole camper fiasco was a pain in the caboose but I turned it into a teaching moment. Then I lost my driver’s license. I know I had it at the Quick Care when I had the stress hives. But they swear it wasn’t left there. I called the pharmacy to see if maybe I left it there but they said it wasn’t there either. The DMV told me to print off a copy of my driving record to at least prove to a police officer that I have a valid license and I’m trying to fix it. Our whole camping vacation itinerary had to be changed, but that all turned out to be fine.
\nThe first thing that had to be done yesterday was go to the DMV. Well…the FIRST thing I did was go pick up the mail to see if anyone had found it and mailed me my license. Nope. Then I went to the county building and got a copy of my birth certificate and marriage license in case I needed it at the DMV. I had my Social Security card and a vehicle registration with me. I have the Federal ID on my Driver’s License. I had to show a gazillion kinds of ID to get that. I thought SURELY I wouldn’t need a gazillion MORE kinds of ID to let them know I’m the same person with all the OTHER kinds of ID. HA! I was SO wrong!
\nI stood in the little pre-line line to let the clerk know what I needed. She looked at what I had. Nope. Not good enough. I needed a bill with my name and address on it. Ok, I had my health insurance bill. I handed that to her. Nope. They can’t accept health insurance. I had my taxes. Nope. Can’t accept federal taxes. OK, I said…what do you need? She underlined all the acceptable forms of identification. I went out to the truck and brought back a second registration for a different vehicle. Nope. Can’t come from the same source. Grrrrr.
\nSo, I drove all the way across town and went to my car insurance agent’s office. I changed my address on my insurance and had them print out an insurance card for me. I drove back across town and stood in the pre-line again. Ok…we’re making progress. I got a number! I sat. And sat. And sat. Finally, my number was called and I ran up to the window with a huge smile.
\n“Identification, please.”
\n“Here you go! A registration and my car insurance…both with my name and address!” I smiled. They aren’t going to beat me this time!
\nThe clerk looked over my papers and said, “I’m sorry, I can’t accept this. The address on the insurance card doesn’t match the one on the car registration.”
\n“What?!?!?!”
\nShe quietly starts tapping on the keyboard and read, taps and reads, taps and reads.
\n“What is your husband’s name?”
\nI told her.
\n“And what is his birthdate?”
\nI told her.
\n“And you got your marriage license in this county?”
\n“Yes, we did.”
\n“Hmmmmm…I can’t find him.”
\nBe calm. Be calm. Be calm.
\nThey’ve added a large copy of the law, highlighted, that says what the punishment is for disruptive behavior in the DMV. It’s pasted everywhere.
\nI looked over at the different styles of license plates you can order. And there…on number six…was a bluebird. I could almost hear Mr. Virgo say “Go easy, baby doll.” I thought of Mr. FixIt and how nothing seems to ruffle his feathers. And my shoulders relaxed.
\n“This must be a difficult job sometimes,” I said to the clerk.
\n“Oh, it’s not so bad.” She smiled as she continued to type and read.
\nFinally, I picked up the insurance card. The bottom half was kind of faded where the cartridge was running out of toner. Sure enough, under “Name and address of owner”, there was a typo in the name of the street. But, above that, under “Name and address of insured”, the address was correct. And clearly darker!
\n“Oh, look! It DOES have the name spelled right on this line! See? The other one is just so light from the printer, it’s hard to read. See the dark one here???”
\nIt worked! My diversionary tactic to take the focus off the wrong one and place it on the right one clearly saved the day!
\n“Oh, my gosh! It must be my glasses! That IS right!” She took my money and quickly handed my number back to me. “You only have one person in front of you so it should take long now!” She smiled sweetly at me.
\nRight.
\nI was there another hour before they took my picture for my new license. And now I have to look at that tired, sweaty, grumpy picture for the next however many years. Or until I lose THIS license. Whichever comes first.
\nThe bottom line is this…these people are just doing their jobs. They don’t make up the rules. They aren’t there to make your life miserable. They just want to earn a buck and go home and put their feet up. So, next time you have to go to the dreaded DMV, bring a smile. Some chocolate for the nice person behind the counter couldn’t hurt either. Maybe I would have gotten out of there quicker if I’d brought a little Hershey’s with me!
\n❤️
\n“Now swear to me here before God that you will not deal falsely with me or my children or my descendants. Show to me and the country where you now reside as a foreigner the same kindness I have shown to you.””\n\n \n", "date_published": "2019-08-09T01:30:34-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2019/08/09/the-dmv-me.html", "tags": ["Uplifting Stories","Overcoming Obstacles","West Virginia","Growth","Wisdom","Anger","Humbled","Presence","Warning","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2019/05/08/too-close-to-home.html", "title": "Too Close to Home", "content_html": "Genesis 21:23 NIV
![\"School](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/57405224ec.jpg\")
“How many more children have to die before something is done about this?”
Another school shooting. Seven miles from Columbine. They recently observed the 20th anniversary of the school shooting that seemed to change everything. Copycat killers, looking for moments of notoriety, sprung up everywhere, it seems.
\nWhat is causing all this? I have my theories. Personally, I think things started taking a giant slide down a slippery slope when Dr. Spock said don’t spank your kids. I’m not for violence by any means, but my kids got a proper swat on their butts when they were out of line. And they are great adults.
\nKids aren’t given outlets for their anger anymore. I was talking with my son-in-law’s mom last night. Her mother was discussing this with her contemporaries in the assisted living center at supper. She said, in her day and age, there were bullies, and kids got in scraps, but you had a row and got it over with. Now, children are handled with kid gloves and they can’t fight back.
\nThey also get left with video games and the internet as their babysitters. You cannot tell me that violent video games don’t have an impact on children today. How can it not? You can’t sit for hours at a time, shooting and maiming “people” in this realistic scenarios and not be desensitized to the violence. It becomes the norm.
\nThis one hit close to home. While not in my daughter’s district, she teaches at a STEM school and my granddaughter is a student at that same school. (Not the one where the shooting occurred yesterday, thank God.) She used to work with many of the teachers at the school where the shooting occurred. The principal is my daughter’s sister-in-law’s best friend.
\nThis is getting too close.
\nThey’re ALL too close!
\nSomething has to be done. Our children go into a war zone every single day. Teachers and school staff, too. This is not the country we were raised in. It’s not the country my children were raised in either. I own guns. But my guns are locked up in a safe. I have a .22 hidden when I am at the farm in case I’m bothered by a two-legged varmint.
\nI pray. I pray a lot. But, something has to be done. Our children are killing and being killed. Prayers are wonderful…but we need more. I’m not writing this to invite debate. This is not the place for that. There are better places for that…like with our representatives. I’m just crying out as a Nana. A very, very concerned Nana.
\nAs an aside…I arrived at the campground without incident.
\nI pray for those families. The ones who got the call. And for the families of the shooters. how horrifying.
\n???
\n“For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother's righteous.\n\n \n", "date_published": "2019-05-08T01:30:06-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2019/05/08/too-close-to-home.html", "tags": ["Faith","Grief","Overcoming Obstacles","Hope","God","Anger","Fear","Courage","Warning","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2019/04/13/always-be-humble-and-kind.html", "title": "Always be Humble and Kind", "content_html": "\n
We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.”
\n\n
1 John 3:11-12, 14-15 ESV
![\"Dandelion\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/47d484a1bf.jpg\")
“I love when God sends me a not-so-gentle reminder to chill out!”
As I’m writing this, I’m propped up in bed, the windows flung wide, the peepers peeping their springtime love song. It is 10:30pm…I just finished a long and particularly grueling day sitting in front of my computer, doing my taxes. One frustration after another…but I doggedly pressed on with only a couple of short tempered outbursts. Finally…finally I got it all filled out and pressed “send” only to find out, yet again, my laptop won’t connect to the internet. I mean…it SAYS it’s connected, but I get a page that says “Cannot find page. Check your internet connection.” It works elsewhere, just not here. So, I said enough is enough for one day and I will pick it up tomorrow….today to you.
\nIn preparation for a day that could be stress-filled, I spent an extra long time in scripture before I got out of bed. I read my devotionals. I listened to a little praise music. I put on the full armor of God. And still, after twelve hours in front of the screen, I found my stress level rising. Poor Mr. FixIt steered clear of me most of the day and when he did have to sit with me, he was very loving and supportive. Good man.
\nWhen I finally called it quits for the day, I was too tired to even go out to TOW-Wanda to write…something I really look forward to when the weather is warm. I came into the bedroom to write, fully prepared to let loose a diatribe about how darned frustrating it is to spend a whole day on the taxes only to find out you have to pay a BOATLOAD. I climbed into bed, set up my little lap desk, opened my iPad, and God smacked me right between the eyes.
\n?
\nThere, staring back at me was a picture of a woman squatting down in front of an absolutely emaciated young child…so tiny and frail and nothing but skin and bones. She’s holding a water bottle up to the child’s lips….the little one with her head tipped back, gratefully taking a sip as she clings to a crust of bread in her tiny hand.
\nI am humbled…ashamed of my anger and frustration that I felt only seconds before.
\nLook what I have. A roof over my head, food on my table, clean water and air, a warm bed to sleep in, health, family…God.
\nYes, paying a big tax bill was not what I expected. But you know what? Just two weeks ago, God gave me a hefty settlement check for the accident I was in two years ago. I had a brain bleed, but can walk and talk. I lost four months of my memory, but my family didn’t have to lay me in the ground. And that check will cover my taxes and then some.
\nThere is always something to be grateful for. ALWAYS.
\nThank you, God…for your provision. And for the stern reminder of how good I have it. You are a good, good Father.
\n❤️
\n“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” Ephesians 4:2 NIV\n", "date_published": "2019-04-13T01:30:37-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2019/04/13/always-be-humble-and-kind.html", "tags": ["Faith","Prayer","Positive Energy","Growth","Gratitude","Grace","God","Wisdom","Anger","Humbled","Presence","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2019/01/25/thoughts-on-conflict-fear.html", "title": "Thoughts on Conflict \u0026 Fear", "content_html": "
![\"Proverbs](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/8661a28774.jpg\")
“Look for the gold in people. There’s enough dirt in the world.”
The other day, we touched on conflicts and how to resolve them peacefully. We all have seen our fair share of conflict in our lives and had dealt with it in the best way we knew how with the knowledge we had at the time. Sometimes it’s worked out ok…sometimes not. The good thing is, we can always continue to learn and grow and get better at the sticking points in life.
\nWhen you are dealing with marriage, here is the single most important thing I have learned. When you find yourself frustrated with your spouse…and you WILL at some point…mind your tongue when you are talking about him with others. If all you do is spout negative things, it won’t be long till that is all you will ever see in him/her. It doesn’t take long to go from speaking these things to outsiders to berating your spouse with all the things they do that tick you off. I can guarantee you…if you feed that beast, it’s all you’ll get back.
\nI learned with Mr. Virgo…once I started to notice something he did that bugged me, that was a sign I wasn’t praying for him enough. Same for Mr. FixIt. We all need grace. It’s a wonderful habit to practice with your spouse or other family members.
\nI had Bible study last night. We talked a little bit after last week’s study about the book “Goliath Must Fall” by Louie Giglio. Last night’s “giant” was FEAR. The first question we were asked was…”How well do you sleep?” Wow. Sometimes really well. Those are the times when things are going well and I really don’t have much to worry about. Other times, I lie awake all night long, staring at the ceiling, working something over and over, turning it this way and that, puzzling over how to…what? Fix it. Manipulate it. Control it. I rehearse conversations ahead of time with not only my dialogue, but that of the other’s as well. As if I have some sort of control over how another person thinks, acts, or responds.
\nSometimes I lie there and worry about an event that isn’t going to happen for eight months. “Will I have the extra weight off before the wedding? What will I wear? What happens if it’s really hot. I don’t do well in heat.” All I have accomplished in that scenario is set myself up for failure and robbed myself of sleep and God’s joy.
\nLast night’s lesson was this…when you lay down to sleep and the things to worry about start lining up…just hand them over to God and go to sleep. He loves you no matter what. He’s bigger than all of the giants. Trust him to work on your problems while you’re asleep. Then you awaken refreshed and can live in God’s Glory.
\nThere is a fine line between anger and fear. Giving your conflicts to God, praying for others, letting go of your fears…all elements that can help lead to a peaceful night’s sleep. ❤️
\n“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”\n\n", "date_published": "2019-01-25T02:30:09-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2019/01/25/thoughts-on-conflict-fear.html", "tags": ["Faith","Family","Overcoming Obstacles","Hope","Positive Energy","Growth","Grace","Love","Peace","Wisdom","Anger","Fear","Forgiveness","Warning","Choices","Change","Marriage"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2019/01/22/action-v-reaction.html", "title": "Action v. Reaction", "content_html": "Ephesians 4:31-32 ESV
![\"MLK\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/1beb3f1755.jpg\")
“The Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr.”
Growing up in the chaos of alcoholic dysfunction made me a reactionary from an early age. There was a lot of anger in my home growing up. Lots of fighting, yelling, slamming, throwing, crashing. I never witnessed my father hitting my mother. He only hit me once. When he did, he came at me from behind and I stood up to him. I stuck my chin out and told him, if he was going to hit me he’d better hit me like a man and do it face to face. I’ll never forget the utter look of defeat on his face in that moment. He dropped his fist to his side, went over to the steps, sat down, and cried. He never went after me again. But, the damage was done. It was done long before that day.
\nI learned to be the peacemaker. To smooth things over. To mediate when things got out of hand. I was the bystander. I acted. Unfortunately, when the anger was directed at me, I reacted. I automatically went into defense mode. I made excuses. I deflected. I diverted attention. I manipulated. It was decidedly unhealthy and took far too many years to come to a head.
\nThe first pivotal moment of my life…that moment when there is a definite line in the sand that separates “all things before” from “all things after” was the overdose. That was when I really did the work necessary to effect permanent change in my life. It’s when I learned about codependency. Before that, there was no clear boundary to define where others ended and I began. I was too busy weaving a web that would hold everything together.
\nLearning about boundaries was a love-hate exercise. I loved finding my voice and standing up for myself. I hated confrontation. I loved the release healthy boundaries gave me because I didn’t have to try to run everyone else’s lives for them. I hated feeling like a fish out of water.
\nIt took a lot of practice. It still does. I still have to remind myself occasionally that I don’t do anyone any favors by not setting boundaries and demand they are respected. I didn’t spend seven hard years in therapy for nothing. Fortunately, Mr. Virgo came into the picture after I had these skills in place and he offered an excellent practice field.
\nAfter sixty-five trips around the sun, I’ve learned enough to know it’s a whole lot easier to carry love than it is anger, hate, discord, dysfunction, or codependency. When I approach any situation from a place of love, my walk becomes more Christ-like. And anytime I lead with “What would Jesus do?”, I am already winning. Conflict is inevitable in life. The only control we have is in how we react to it. ❤️
\n“For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”\n\n", "date_published": "2019-01-22T02:30:08-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2019/01/22/action-v-reaction.html", "tags": ["Health","Family","Overcoming Obstacles","Prayer","Hope","Positive Energy","Growth","Peace","Wisdom","Anger","Fear","Forgiveness","Courage","Presence","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2018/10/24/stress-tired-attitude.html", "title": "Stress + Tired = Attitude", "content_html": "Galatians 1:10 ESV
![\"Speak](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/ec0366fa5a.jpg\")
“The tongue can wreak havoc in any relationship.”
What do you get when you mix two tired people working hard to meet a deadline? Well, sometimes you get a snarky remark and an even snarkier comeback. Neither of which are constructive or useful. How many times have I written that the tongue can wreak havoc in a relationship? Yet, there I was…Queen of the Snarky Retort.
\nI knew right away I didn’t speak life into the situation. And I immediately went to Mr. FixIt and apologized. Sincerely.
\nWhile this has been a wonderful time with the wedding and all, it’s also been stressful trying to get everything done and we are both desperately looking forward to our time away.
\nIt’s perfectly normal to have moments of frustration when you’re living in close proximity with another human. How you deal with differences says a lot in how successful your relationship will be. Admitting your weaknesses, asking forgiveness, and praying for guidance goes a long way toward maintaining harmony in the home. If you fight, you need to fight fair.
\nMr. FixIt is an extremely easygoing man. He has been understanding when I write every night. He’s a TV watcher. I am a writer. We do our own thing after dinner and reconnect later. That being said, we are about to embark on our honeymoon. And as much as I love you all, and as much as writing is the same as breathing for me, I’ve decided y’all are just going to have to sit this one out. I’m going to schedule a scripture to post everyday while we are gone so you have something to ponder. Please feel free to talk amongst yourselves here on my blog. I love when you all interact and support one another.
\nI’ll be back on Election Day! ❤️
\n“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,” Ephesians 4:26 NIV
\n", "date_published": "2018-10-24T01:30:21-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2018/10/24/stress-tired-attitude.html", "tags": ["Health","Family","Overcoming Obstacles","Hope","Growth","Gratitude","Grace","Love","God","Wisdom","Anger","Forgiveness","Humbled","Presence","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2018/05/31/the-power-of-words.html", "title": "The Power of Words", "content_html": "![\"Shhhhhhhh\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/286bc98eb3.jpg\")
“Shhhhhh…..”
Events of the last couple of years, and certainly the last week, have demonstrated the absolute destructive power of the spoken word. Caution…I am NOT discussing politics here nor specific individuals or what has been said. What I’m talking about is society’s shift toward having no filter whatsoever. My elderly aunt once said something to me that was downright mean-spirited. When she was done, I just looked at her calmly and said, “You know, that was very mean.” She said, “Yeah, well…it popped into my head so I figured I might as well say it!” Ok…she’s 84 with declining mental faculties. I can forgive that. But some of the things I hear these days makes me want to hold my hands over my ears and go screaming into the night.
\nYesterday, one of the news channels out of Denver that I still follow was airing a live video feed of a cow elk in labor and attempting to give birth. It was pretty boring, actually. I mean…how long can to sit and stare at a cow elk laying down, standing up, laying down, standing up, pushing, laying down…you get the picture. There was no “happy ending” coming anytime soon and there had already been sixteen hours of this. I soon bored of watching the elk who was desperately trying to become a mama and started reading the comments people were making.
\nI was appalled. What started out innocently enough, ie “Oh, no! Is the mama cow in trouble? This has been going on a long time!” to “You stupid ******* idiot, it’s an elk, not a cow!” to “Veal comes from a boy calf who gets ripped from his mama and kept in the dark and fed only milk.” to “YOU’RE the ******* cow, *****!” Holy cats! It took five minutes to go south. People seem to be of the opinion, like my elderly, slightly dotty aunt, that if it pops in your head, you might as well say it.
\nPeople who have seen great commercial success have seen their empires crumble for saying abhorrent things. Men have lost their careers and everything they have built because of things they said. I am NOT standing up for those men who are truly deserving of retribution and I totally think you need to be held accountable for the things that come out of your mouth. But, you have to ask yourself, what would keep a disgruntled employee or associate from claiming such abuse when the accused is actually innocent. You know it happens.
\nWhen is it ok to be a racist? The answer is…never. When is it ok to be anti Semitic? The answer is…never. When is it ok to be homophobic and denigrate someone on social media for their sexual preference? The answer is…never. Liberals, conservatives, gay, straight, black, white, and every shade in between…we’re all the same inside. We all bleed red and breathe oxygen. The thing is…I don’t think of it as being “politically correct.” I think of it as being a decent human being with good character. God tells us in the Bible that the tongue has incredible power. We can bring blessings or curses…life or death…light or darkness. All with a muscle the size of a small banana.
\nSuch power words have. Lifelong scars can happen in an instant. Broken promises. Little white lies. Great big lies. Gossip. Slander. Such damage that can be done without thinking. We see it over and over. You’d think they’d learn, wouldn’t you?
\nProverb 10:19 says…”Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues.” Proverbs 15:4 says “The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.” Matthew 15:11 says…”What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them.” The Bible warns over and over and over to hold your tongue. Watch your words. I am as guilty as anyone for speaking before thinking…far too many times. But age and maturity and God’s grace is going far toward helping me keep a rein in on my tongue. And what I miss, God forgives me when I am truly repentant. I hope the next generation learns this. I hope they learn the delicate art of speaking gently. ❤
\n“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”\nEphesians 4:29 NIV
\n\n", "date_published": "2018-05-31T01:30:32-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2018/05/31/the-power-of-words.html", "tags": ["Uplifting Stories","Overcoming Obstacles","Positive Energy","Growth","Grace","God","Peace","Wisdom","Anger","Courage","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2016/03/12/angelversary.html", "title": "Angelversary", "content_html": "\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/1293d37d97.jpg\")
I so wanted to write a beautiful, totally upbeat story today about how wonderful my life is and how up and optimistic I'm feeling and how this day is just like every other day in my hap-hap-happy life. Yesterday morning, I could do that. And tomorrow, I'll more than likely be able to. But today? Well, in all honesty...I don't know how today is going to pan out. I can tell you, however, that I am writing this on Friday afternoon and Friday afternoon, I crashed and burned.
\n\n\nI was fine all day yesterday. Really fine. I exercised with my trainer/friend. We had a nice lunch and sat out in the sun. I ran errands. I took a little nap. I went to City Park to walk some more. And, that's when it hit me. That incessant witch in my head that insists on pointing out every happy fricking couple driving through the park...walking together...holding hands on a warm, sunny, spring day. Today I hate them. Thankfully, tomorrow I won't notice them. But today, they suck.
\n\n\nBut...here's the good news. Here's what will give you hope. Even as I sat in my truck at the park, hands on the wheel, unable to get out, tears rolling down my cheeks to drip off my chin, momentary bitterness consuming me....even with that, a text came in offering understanding and a prayer that my angelversary goes well. And I knew, this angst and bitterness is, indeed, momentary. I haven't had a long stretch of melancholia in a long time.
\n\n\nThe uplifting text brought me out of my reverie and I dragged my feelings home to deal with them in a constructive way. I grabbed a beverage, turned on the gas campfire on the deck, and caught some great shots of the sun setting over my beloved Ohio River...its glassy surface reflecting the clouds. I settled into my chair and listened to the peepers calling from the pond across the cornfield. The phone rang and my spunky friend from high school called to check in and see how I'm doing. I'm doing fine, really. It's just that...in that moment...it really sucked.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2016-03-12T02:30:51-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2016/03/12/angelversary.html", "tags": ["Grief","Wisdom","Anger","Choices","Widow"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2016/02/23/when-hate-become-bigger-than.html", "title": "When Hate Become Bigger Than Love", "content_html": "\n“You’ve kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights, Each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book.”
\nPsalm 56:8 MSG\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/0ed4021e57.jpg\")
Gandhi urged us to be the change we want to see in the world. If we want goodness, we must be good people. Mr. Virgo called me Pollyanna because I always look for the good...always. When you look for the bad, it's all you will ever see. It becomes the lens through which you observe everything. It is poisonous, killing you and your loving heart, your caring mind.
\n\n\nBut even I, in my eternal sunshine of being, am becoming weary. I shared a meme on my personal page yesterday. It was a picture of our President and First Lady, dancing. It wasn't meant as a political statement. The message was this. Whether you hate him, or you hate her, THEY are not the problem. HATE is the problem. I'm not talking politics here. I'm talking about the human condition and hate is rampant out there. It baffles me.
\n\n\nWithin seconds...SECONDS....of posting this message against hatred, my page was bombarded with angry messages. From people I know. People I love. People I have trusted with my heart. It was extremely discouraging. And it hurt my soul. I know...I should have known better. I came close to touching the third rail. I took the post down. Not in defeat but for self-preservation.
\n\n\nI cannot hate. I've been angry enough to entertain it in my heart before and it kills me. Hate is a product. Fear begets anger which in turn begets hatred. It's a cancer. It is relentless and will not be satisfied. It is hungry. But I cannot dine at that table. I can't even hate the haters. I'm not milquetoast, either. I have opinions and I can stand up for them.
\n\n\nWhat must Jesus be thinking?
\n\n\n\"See...I told you to love your neighbor as you love yourself. What are you doing???\"
\n\n\nBut...they've forgotten. We're ALL neighbors.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2016-02-23T02:30:36-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2016/02/23/when-hate-become-bigger-than.html", "tags": ["Love","Wisdom","Anger","Fear"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2016/02/03/a-brief-history-of-windows.html", "title": "A Brief History of Windows", "content_html": "\n““A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.””
\nJohn 13:34-35 NIV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/8a46fc65a4.jpg\")
Microsoft: Here...let's learn a new language. It'll be fun!
\n\n\nMe: Cool! I'm game! Let's learn a new language!!! I love languages!
\n\n\n(tick tock, tick tock)
\n\n\nMicrosoft: How ya' doin'? Are you learning?
\n\n\nMe: Oh, yeah! Wow...this is really amazing. It does a lot for me. I think maybe if you you tweaked this and adjusted that, it could work even better. Whaddya think? You up for that?
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Sure thing! Coming right up!!! Anything for you, sweetheart...you're my bread and butter!
\n\n\nMe: Awesome, thanks! I'll get to work now.
\n\n\nMicrosoft: No problem, babe. We'll keep tweaking and adjusting. We want you to be hap-hap-happy! I'll be right here if you need me.
\n\n\n(tick tock, tick tock)
\n\n\nMe: Ummmm, excuse me. I'm having a little problem over here. I bought a new computer and suddenly there's this mess on my desktop. It's called Windows 8. You know anything about that?
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Oh, that? That's a new language we just came up with. You like it?
\n\n\nMe: Well, no as a matter of fact, I don't.
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Really? We were sure you'd love it. You've loved everything else. What's wrong with it? (petulant sigh implied)
\n\n\nMe: Well, for starters, where the hell is my start button? I can't get into my programs menu.
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Oh, you don't need that old thing! We made your desktop look like a giant cellphone. Just click on these thingies here. You like your cellphone, don't you?
\n\n\nMe: Yes. Yes, I do...but I don't like this mess! Can I just have my old desktop back, please?
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Oh, hey girl...I'm really sorry about that, but we threw that baby out with the bath water. I mean, that's the price of progress right?
\n\n\nMe: I don't like this. And now my Office 2013 crashes ever since I updated with Windows 8.1! I need you to fix this...now!
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Hey, chill...no need for you to get all up in it! Those two programs aren't compatible.
\n\n\nMe: What??? You provided an \"improvement\" that negates my entire way of operating my computer? What am I supposed to do now???
\n\n\nMicrosoft: No problem! Here's Windows 10 and Office 2016!!! Let's learn a new language. It'll be fun!
\n\n\nMe: (pulling hair out and banging forehead on desk) Arrrrrrgh!!!!!
\n\n\nMicrosoft: Look, Windows 10 is FREE! That'll be $229.99 for Office, please.
\n\n\nCha-Ching!)
\n\n\n?
\n\n\n\n\n\n\n“Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.””
\nJohn 13:7 NIV\n
*While this scripture provides an interesting segue, and in the context of the post could be construed as humorous, I chose it to demonstrate how we cannot always know in the moment why things are happening the way they are, but there will be understanding down the road. Patience is, after all, a virtue.
❤️
\n\n", "date_published": "2016-02-03T02:30:33-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2016/02/03/a-brief-history-of-windows.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2015/11/18/peace-on-earth-goodwill-to.html", "title": "Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men", "content_html": "\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/dbf9cf1268.jpg\")
The angry rhetoric on my personal Facebook page lately has been disheartening. From people with whom I share genes to literal strangers who have somehow been included in my \"friends list\", I have witnessed shocking ugliness. Shocking. Ok, perhaps my shock is intensified by the fact that I don't watch TV except for The Voice and that's all about the love. My news is gathered selectively. So my feelers are pretty untouched by outside influence.
\n\n\nI am not immune to what's going on in the world. I do not have my head in the sand. I know where I stand politically, morally, ethically. Hateful, angry posts are going to get removed. I will \"unfollow\" those who spread this ugliness. If they unfriend me, I will send them on their way with love and light. But I will not engage. I will not engage.
\n\n\nThe enemy's modus operandi is \"Divide and Conquer\". He lives off of chaos. He thrives on confusion. He pits man against man, brother against brother. The entire universe is energy. Everything. He understands that. He may be crafty but he's not particularly creative. So he tricks us into doing his dirty work FOR him. And, like lemmings to the sea, we do it...every single time. He needs more team players. He knows how to recruit.
\n\n\nAll negative, dark things are a low frequency energy. All positive, light things are high frequency. Even thoughts. Especially thoughts. Thoughts create and materialize in the real world. Elevate the frequency. Change the world. As Einstein says...\"This is not philosophy. This is physics.\" It's just like turning a dial on a shortwave.
\n\n\nAll this said, there comes a time when we need to stand up to defend ourselves, or others who cannot. With honor. There's a difference between standing up with honor and saying, \"Enough!\" and with forming a lynch mob for everyone with the same facial characteristics of the evil doer.
\n\n\nDon't let darkness pull you in and make him stronger. Don't be afraid. Turn to the light. BE the light we need in the world today. Share the love.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2015-11-18T02:30:40-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2015/11/18/peace-on-earth-goodwill-to.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2015/10/03/seeing-red.html", "title": "Seeing Red", "content_html": "\n“Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy. The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.”
\nPsalm 28:6-7 NIV\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/b310a522b8.jpg\")
You are about to see a side of me that I seldom reveal. I avoid talking politics like I avoid questionable restaurants and dark alleys. They are dangerous and usually a hazard to my health...or perhaps the health of others. I saw a post on Facebook last night. Apparently Ann Coulter Tweeted during a presidential debate and called President Obama the \"R-word\". The gentleman on the left there is John Franklin Stephens, a Global Messenger for Special Olympics. John responded to Ms. Coulter's use of the derogatory word with an open letter to her posted on the Special Olympics blog. You can read his articulate response HERE.
\n\n\nAlthough I am seeing red at the perpetuation of this ugly term, that's not what I'm writing about today. I shared this post on my Facebook page last night. You see, there are two words I will not tolerate...the N-word and the R-word. The N-word goes without saying. The R-word is personal. There is someone from high school on my Facebook page named Dave. Now, Dave and I have gone round and round on a few subjects. But, last night, Dave came back saying there was nothing wrong with the word retard as it meant \"to slow down\". I responded with this:
\n\n\n\"Ok, you are referring to \"ri-TAHRD\" and you are correct with your definition. Ms. Coulter is using the slang term \"RE-tahrd\" which is derogatory. Of course, you KNOW this. What you may not know however is I have a wonderful brother with a developmental disability. He has been the recipient of this particularly nasty epithet his entire life. I have, quite literally, kicked the ass of anyone ignorant enough to have called him this in my presence. I have discussed your fat-shaming remarks in an effort to enlighten you. I have unfollowed you so as to not read your remarks because my mama raised a nice girl. But you have barked up my tree for the last time, Dave. I will leave this on here till you see it then I am unfriending you. I will also pray that God gives you a conscience. Or herpes. I haven't decided yet.\"
\n\n\n*mike drop*
\n\n\n\n\n\n", "date_published": "2015-10-03T01:30:44-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2015/10/03/seeing-red.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Choices"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2015/09/27/anger.html", "title": "Anger", "content_html": "\n“They know nothing, they understand nothing; their eyes are plastered over so they cannot see, and their minds closed so they cannot understand.”
\nIsaiah 44:18\n
![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/b2e913f10e.jpg\")
I chatted with a reader yesterday about anger. She said she was having some problems lashing out at people. She didn't feel she was necessarily angry with her late husband but she was sure as heck angry with everyone else in the world. She wondered if maybe that meant that deep down she really IS angry at him. Ahhhhh, she's getting it. In the early weeks after losing Mr. Virgo, I secretly hated everybody. I especially hated happy couples walking hand in hand or, God forbid, kissing. I was on a bus one time and it was everything I could do to keep from screaming \"Stop it! You're killing me!!!\" to the couple across from me. I hated them. Angry, white-hot hate that came from some primal spot in the innermost crevasse where my heart used to live, happily intact and beating. I think I did a pretty good job of hiding this anger from others since my MO as the \"Keeper of the Non-Rocking Boat\" has been pretty much the standard in my life. So it seethed and boiled inside of me, eating away.
\n\n\nI was blessed to be in a job at the time with extremely flexible hours. After Mr. Virgo died, I bought my first little camper and took off for the mountains for 3 months. I drove as far back in the wilderness as I could get. And that's where I got in touch with my anger. There was nothing but wildlife for miles around so I screamed. I yelled at God for taking my man. I yelled at Mr. Virgo for having the unmitigated gall to up and die on me. I yelled at him for smoking and for not getting the tests done a few months before when the doctor wanted a work up. I yelled at myself for not insisting. I yelled. I screamed. I cried.
\n\n\nFor months. I wrestled with angels. When I finally dropped with exhaustion, hands limply folded in my lap, I was spent. I was emotionally empty. I could not begin to rebuild my life until every bit of the rubble from the wreckage was swept away. Well, at least tidied up and organized. I stirred what little was left of my anger into the mortar and rebuilt my foundation. I'm still working on it. We all experience anger when we lose someone important to us. And yes, we get angry at the perp. They left us. They changed our lives forever. Don't feel guilty for that. It's ok to live in anger for awhile. Just don't make it a permanent address.
\n\n\n❤️
\n\n\n“See what they spew from their mouths— the words from their lips are sharp as swords, and they think, “Who can hear us?”” Psalm 59:7 Photo Credit: www.playbuzz.com
\n\n", "date_published": "2015-09-27T01:30:33-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2015/09/27/anger.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Forgiveness"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2015/01/15/just-say-no.html", "title": "Just Say No", "content_html": "\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/b8cf334415.jpg\")
I'm learning. I'm being given repeated opportunities to practice kindness and patience. It's as though God said, \"Honey…you weren't paying attention in class when you should have learned this so I'm just going to keep bashing your head against this door till you get it, ok?\" Uh, yeah…sure.
\n\n\nI had another unfortunate conversation with my aunt today. Only this time, I felt bad for a MUCH shorter period of time. Why? Because, I realized this vitriol she fires in my direction at every opportunity has nothing at all to do with me and everything to do with HER! I realized I cannot get attacked if I do not engage in battle. She can poke and prod and pinch and hurt as often as she wants to. I'll just put on my armor and walk on through.
\n\n\nJust say no…to drama. To snotty backlashes. To bullying. And don't stand there and take blow after blow. Stand up and say \"No. You cannot treat me this way.\" And leave. I know it's easier said than done. But you'll feel so much better afterwards if you stand up for…YOU!
\n\n\n❤
\n\n", "date_published": "2015-01-15T02:30:00-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2015/01/15/just-say-no.html", "tags": ["Overcoming Obstacles","Growth","Wisdom","Anger","Aging","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2014/11/30/changing-feet.html", "title": "Changing Feet", "content_html": "\n![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/095a49536c.jpg\")
I only open my mouth to change feet. Ever feel that way? A dozen words. Spoken while tired. Spoken without thinking. Spoken while grieving. They caused some hurt feelings which in turn caused a lashing out which caused my feelings to be hurt as well.
\n\n\nI have been so occupied with making this move, getting settled in, and getting the house ready for winter. I guess I wasn't being as in tuned to my aunt as I should have been. Bless her heart. She has had this place all to herself for the last six years. I have tried to be sensitive to that, but I will have to try harder. This cannot be easy for her. To feel like you're losing control. And we are both very strong willed, independent women. We are bound to butt heads on occasion.
\n\n\nBack up. Adjust. Move forward. Back up. Adjust. Move forward. This is life. It's like turning a camper around in a really tight place. You have to figure in the space, the length of the object, and go a little bit at a time. Oh, that is not an easy thing to do for my full-steam-ahead self! Patience. Breathe. Let go.
\n\n\nOn the plus side, I did find a stove with a pilot light today. They are as hard as hen's teeth to find! I finally found one by Hotpoint that I had to order from Lowe's. The electric goes out here on the farm so frequently, we really needed a stove with a pilot light. Eureka! <3
\n\n", "date_published": "2014-11-30T14:09:58-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2014/11/30/changing-feet.html", "tags": ["Wisdom","Anger","Aging","Choices","Change"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2014/03/05/forgiveness.html", "title": "Forgiveness", "content_html": "![\"proverbs](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/7217a02a3a.jpg\")
“Proverbs of Solomon”
I learned last night that one of my friends can curse like a sailor. I learned this after sharing a private message that one of Mr. Virgo’s cousins send to me. When I first saw his name pop up, I was thrilled. I hadn’t heard from him in quite a while. Imagine my utter shock when the message I received was callous and hurtful. He was on a rant because I had relayed stories here on FB about Mr. Virgo’s military record, and some other family stories, that he said was, if not a gross exaggeration, were outright lies and he was insulted. He asked me to please leave his family out of my blog posts and to unfriend him. I was stunned. First of all, I only repeated the stories Mr. Virgo told me. I did not exaggerate or lie. Second, I have a drawer full of medals from Vietnam and I know they were my husband’s. Could Mr. Virgo have embellished his stories? I must concede the possibility. But he was a good and honorable man and I choose to believe him.
\nWhat kind of cruel, heartless person lashes out at a grieving widow one week before the anniversary of her husband’s death? I was devastated and sobbed for hours last evening. Then I recalled the bible verse above. I prayed for my husband’s cousin and I forgave him for hurting me and told him so. I feel so sorry for someone like that. Then I unfriended him. We didn’t know each other anyway so it isn’t a great loss in my life. Just an excellent opportunity to walk in the Word and pray for someone with pain.
\n", "date_published": "2014-03-05T02:30:16-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2014/03/05/forgiveness.html", "tags": ["Grief","Anger","Forgiveness","Courage"] }, { "id": "http://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/2013/12/04/grumpy.html", "title": "Grumpy", "content_html": "![\"\"](\"https://mashmallowranch.micro.blog/uploads/2026/e73a6aa485.jpg\")
Okay…we’re going to totally shift gears here. I know I come across a lot of the time as this little earth mother spouting grace and wisdom and love and light but I’m not feeling it right now. How many of you have lost your spouse, in one way or another, and now you are on your own and you couldn’t find the jumper cables and had to go to the hardware store after an already full day so you could jump the car in the driveway and move it before the major winter storm which is now raging out there with a foot of snow on the ground and much more coming and you worked all day only to come home at 25 miles per hour to an empty, cold house and a snow shovel with your name…and your name ONLY…on it?! Show of hands? Okay, now….how many of you got so mad at him for dying on you that you could just spit nails? I hope to high heavens it’s not just me. I know that anger is one of the stages of grief and I also know there is no timetable as to when that bad boy is going to show up! I was stunned at the rage that just boiled up in me while I was trying to push the snow off the driveway when I was already tired from a long day at the office. The thing I’m most angry about is, that if he hadn’t smoked, he might have lived longer and not left me alone to do everything by myself. So I shoveled enough to clear the front sidewalk and a path up to the door. I called my lawn sprinkler dude and begged him to go into the snow removal business. (He’ll be here tomorrow…yay! I think I scared him! lol) And I came in and drew a hot bath. I’ve settled down now, for the most part. But, you know what? Sometimes this just stinks and you gotta blow off some steam and move on. I can guarantee you one thing…the big yellow ball in the sky will come up again tomorrow and the world will look a lot brighter. Well…literally, it will. It’s snowing, remember?
Happy “First-Really-Big-Snowfall-of-the-year” Day!
\n", "date_published": "2013-12-04T02:30:21-06:00", "url": "https://marshmallowranch.com/2013/12/04/grumpy.html", "tags": ["Grief","Overcoming Obstacles","Anger","Fear"] } ] }