I am so blessed. I have the love of family and friends. I have a tiny home on wheels that’s paid for. I have a reliable vehicle. I have skills and the abilities I need to support myself. I have a sense of adventure. I have a God that loves me and will see me through anything. And, I have the love of a wonderful man that I can feel every day…all the way from heaven.

I was standing in the kitchen yesterday having a spirited discussion about politics. Yes…me. The person who has always avoided political discussions much like one might avoid kissing your weird Uncle Charlie on the lips….probably harmless in the long run but definitely distasteful. We covered myriad topics from global warming to current events in the Middle East. From abortion to gun control. I have never been capable of fighting my way out of a paper bag with both hands and a flashlight. Yet, here I was…by golly, I was holding my own. I wasn’t upset. I didn’t feel stupid. I had opinions and I expressed them eloquently. I am not kidding when I tell you I could not have done this before…even as late as this time last year.

One of the biggest changes in my life has been finding my voice. I never really knew how I felt about things, at least enough to feel confident in my opinions, until I started this grief journey. It took writing every day and getting positive feedback on a regular basis. It took being away on the road, by myself and with diverse groups, to get away from the influence of those whose opinions I trusted more than my own. I feel more of a whole person now. I trust my own mind. I can bring more to the table than the ability to throw a great party or get the stains out of my tea towels. I was telling someone the other day that much of what I have learned in the last 57 months is what most people learn in their 20’s and 30’s. It has been an amazing path full of mountains and valleys. Learning to use the obstacles along the way as stepping stones instead of stumbling blocks is a valuable skill.

❤️

““Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.””

Matthew 11:28-30 NIV