Mr. Virgo always worked the holidays. All of them. You never knew when, or where, your Thanksgiving Dinner or Christmas was going to be year to year. We didn’t get to see things like fireworks together or kiss at the stroke of midnight. Such is the nature of the food service industry. And, since I am the “World’s Most Flexible Person”, this did not bother me. As long as I knew Mr. Virgo was going to be there, I’d celebrate…period. Didn’t matter, because every day was a holiday with that man.

This picture was taken Christmas 2011. I was at my friends’ house, cooking dinner and celebrating the love we shared. It was a beautiful day. We had prime rib, or maybe duck, and some sort of parsnips au gratin, I think. Lots of deliciousness. Barbara is a fabulous cook. And a fabulous friend.

We met when we were both relatively new to the community…our husbands were new doctors. We were new doctor’s wives. She did it so much better than me. I was a fish out of water…she was a swan. I never really fit the mold of doctor’s wife. Barbara did it perfectly. And I mean that in the very best way. She was active in the community. She was big in the hospital auxiliary. She led the charge for fund raising and chaired committees. She was a leader in her church and active in her children’s classrooms. She baked the best treats, by hand, for every function. She quilted, knitted, cross stitched to perfection. Her house was immaculate. She exercised, skied, camped, fished, hiked. She dressed to the nines, always looking polished and put together. All the while running her husband’s practice. And even though she is about ten years younger than me, I always wanted to be her when I grew up.

She is one of a handful of people from the medical community that stuck by me when my ex and I separated. And even though she and her family moved to another state, we continued to remain close. When Mr. Virgo and I got married, she was right there putting it all together at the venue. And she was right there when I buried him…holding my hand and keeping that sacred space for me to come to when the pain became unbearable. Barbara is one of those friends. You know the ones. You may not see each other or even talk for months at a time. And when you get together, you nearly pick up the conversation with the last thought you had. I admire her and I love her and I get to have lunch with her today. Who’s the lucky girl?

One of the greatest things we women can do for ourselves is cultivate friendships with other women. Because there may very well come a day when that’s our primary relationship. Girlfriends and memories.

❤