The last few days, we’ve been talking about feeling stretched thin, feeling frayed and frazzled, overwhelmed with the nature of the world we find ourselves currently living in. Changes have been thrust upon us and not all of us accommodate as easily as others. I am sure we would be hard pressed to find someone who has not been affected in some negative way by the events of the last year. 

I chat every night with one of the dearest people in my life. Sue always has a supportive word, a kind thought, a golden nugget of wisdom to share with me. I didn’t grow up with a sister. One of my lifelong friends is my baby sister. Sue is the older sister I didn’t get to have and I love her dearly. I’ve been sharing with her of late....a bone weariness of the things that have been thrown at us for far too long. 

I’m happy to be back today. I was suffering one of the less pleasant side effects of this parathyroid tumor...just another reason to get this thing taken care of as soon as possible. I’d say by this time next month, I should be well on the road to feeling like my old self. Big prayers, anyway!

Yesterday was the most beautiful day. One of those really rare treats in a West Virginia winter...a crystal clear blue sky...not a cloud in sight. I slept soundly in the guest bedroom and didn’t awaken till late morning, but when I got up my guy was waiting for me with a great big smile. I always feel so much better when I see my sweet man. I told him we could NOT waste a minute of a beautiful day like this. Within a half hour, we were on the road to run some errands in town. 

What do you get a guy who has EV.ERY.THING? Mr. FixIt’s birthday was yesterday. We don’t go overboard on things like that but I always want to give him something I know he will enjoy. We aren’t traveling till after the next covid vaccine and I get my surgery in Florida. We don’t dine out in restaurants. And the day was snowy, icy, and cold so we weren’t going anywhere anyway. 

I can see that I am going to need to put a little structure into my time spent chasing rabbits down the pathways to my past. If not, I could very easily sit myself down in my big comfy chair and never get up. It is not lost on me that my mom developed the pulmonary emboli that killed her by sitting in her recliner, day after day, doing genealogy research. I believe I will need to assign certain hours as acceptable research time. The rest needs to be spent on something more physical and productive in order to maintain good health.

One of my mama’s very favorite things to do was research our genealogy. Lands, she had boxes of handwritten notes and charts and graphs. She had books that were dedicated to different branches of our family tree. And she was on a first-name basis with the librarians in town who helped her do research. Oh, she loved it so. She gathered a bunch of her direct line and made a little booklet. She copied them off and sold them to family member for the price of the copying. She was so proud of it, and everyone still has their copies. 

Aging ain’t for sissies, is it. I’m sixty-seven now, and while that’s not elderly by any stretch of the imagination...I’m no spring chicken. “Grief Brain” threw me for a loop. The first couple of years after losing Mr. Virgo, I couldn’t remember things without writing lists and then I couldn’t remember where I put them. Things just seemed to fall through the crack and it really scared me. But, with time and healing, that got a lot better. Then...I had a closed head injury.

I’m a much simpler, less demanding, uncomplicated woman than I used to be. I’m highly flexible, if not terribly patient. When I first came to live at the Ponderosa, one of the first things I noticed was how difficult it was to wash dishes with the faucet that was on the kitchen sink.  It was exceedingly low, and it had one of those water filter attachments. It was terribly cumbersome and I just hated it. 

I had to run to town yesterday for a followup breast ultrasound. I have a cyst growing where the one was removed a couple of years ago. So, it turned out ok, I think. The official report isn’t in yet, but the tech says I just have a tendency to produce cysts. As long as they’re benign, I’m ok with that. Just remember...get the tatas checked regularly, ladies.

BC...Before Covid...I used to get together with my girlfriends from high school at least once a month for coffee. We had a class dinner at least a couple of times a year. I met friends for walking, lunch, or live music. It seems like that was a whole lifetime ago...maybe two. And now, with the threat of the more contagious variants, it can make one weary.