I come to the family cemetery several times a week. There is no cell service at the farm, so this is the nearest place available. I bought my mother a low stone that is much like a bench. When I am staying at the farm, I come here, visit, listen to the sounds of nature, and write my post for the next day. It’s so peaceful up on this hill.
When Mr. Virgo died, I had him buried…at his request. I would have preferred cremation so I could scatter his ashes in all our favorite places. Instead, I had the funeral director cut a lock of his hair so I could leave a few strands at the important places in my life. This is one of them. I buried some of his beautiful silver hair beside my mom’s headstone so I can visit him, too.
I’m heading east today to visit family overnight then head on to DC on Thursday for the conference I’m speaking at. I’m SO excited!
When I think of my life on March 11th, 2013 compared to today, it boggles my mind. That was the day before Mr. Virgo died. The day before my life changed forever. The day before I lost…everything. Everything that mattered to me. That’s what it felt like. Of course, I didn’t really lose everything. I have wonderful friends. I have a loving family. I do meaningful work. I spread a message of love and hope and joy. My life is rich and full and beautiful. I love and am loved. A friend came to visit me for lunch yesterday and asked if I was happy. I didn’t even skip a beat and said “Yes.” I am happy. I told my friend you don’t ever get over this kind of loss. But, you do get through it. You learn how to work around that hole in your heart without falling in every single time you get too close.
For the longest time, I felt I would be betraying Mr. Virgo if I said I was happy. I even felt guilty for FEELING happy. That is perfectly normal. Now I can feel him smiling when I feel joy. He would want this for me.
Rest in peace. Live in peace, too.
❤️
“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”
Colossians 3:15 NIV