Sometimes I get so tired of grief. I want it to just go away. Leave me alone. I just want to BE. I don’t want to have to deal with all the crap that comes with it. I didn’t ask for this in the first place. You get me, don’t you. I know you do. Those of you walking this journey totally get this. The thing is…it’s like the Hotel California. Grief can check it any time it wants…but it can never leave. Not entirely. But what it can do is change. It can ease. It can retreat.

It’s ok for you to retreat, too. You don’t have to fight this battle every single live long day. You don’t have to carry the weight of this 24/7. I get respite when I hand it over to God and ask him to carry it…and me…for a while. Just a while…till I catch my breath. Till I feel stronger. You don’t have to go to a fancy schmancy spa place to have a retreat either. Here are some gentle, self-care things you can do to give yourself that little extra love and support you need. You can set aside some special time and make a day or just an afternoon of it. Or just incorporate some into your daily routines. I guarantee you will at least feel stronger, a little more centered, a little less stressed out if you take care of yourself. And it doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg.

Try some of these and let me know how they work for you:

• – Go for a walk when the sun is the highest. Walk toward the sun for at least 20 minutes to get the most light on your retina that you can.
• – Stretch for ten minutes.
• – Find a yoga video on YouTube and follow along.
• – Try a free guided meditation from Deepak Chopra’s website.
• – Soak in a hot bath with Epsom salts to detox. Add a couple drops of lavender oil. Wrap up in a hot blanket or robe and curl up on your side in the fetal position. Hug your knees to your chest and breath slow, deep breaths. Concentrate on your belly…just under your rib cage. Breathe into that space. Feel it relax and release some of the tension you carry there. That is your solar plexus and we tend to carry our grief tension there. At least, that’s where I feel mine. Cry if you need to and then nap it off.
• – Listen to soft music.
• – Eat a little comfort food. Something that warms your soul.
• – Massage your feet, hands, neck, and head. Massage your face. We carry an amazing amount of stress in our faces when we have that “I’m just fine!” look on them that we are so wont to have. It takes a whole lot of work to hold back tears.
• – Start a gratitude journal.
• – Set yourself up for a good night’s sleep. I have a friend who often does a guided meditation at bedtime and uses it as a transition to sleep. Don’t eat a heavy meal too late in the evening. Avoid caffeine drinks after 1:00 in the afternoon. Turn off the electronics and the TV at least an hour before bedtime. Drink warm milk or Sleepytime Tea before bed.

All these thing are easy to do and great, but FIRST…pray. Give it up. Hand it over. Lay all those worries and cares down. God listens even when we don’t have the words.

❤️

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.”

Romans 8:26 NIV