This is a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before. ~ Maya Angelou

I can’t remember my last difficult day. I no longer pontificate each sadness that washes over me. I haven’t had a “bad night” in a few months. I don’t hold my breath as much anymore. My tongue is no longer pressed to the back of my teeth in an effort to keep from screaming. My tears are sweet reminders of a precious love instead of gut wrenching sobs of relentless sorrow. There is measurable, palpable relief oozing from my soul.

Thinking back over the last three years, I vacillated between thinking I would never, ever get past this to seeing far off glimpses of light at the end of the tunnel. There’s no finite “end” to grief. It is my lot in life. It is what I live with. But it no longer defines me. There was a time in the not so distant past that I led off many new introductions with, “My name is Ginny. I’m a widow.” As if it were some sort of 12 Step program and I was stuck on the first one. Grief was my primary language. I remember those days. I remember how painful they were…how confused, frustrated, and flat out angry it made me.

Each day is a beautiful gift. Each experience is an opportunity to stretch beyond who I was yesterday toward who I’ll be tomorrow. Each morning is a time of great anticipation and each night brings a moment of quiet reflection and sincere gratitude. And in the middle is “now”. These are the days after death row. The sentence has been commuted. These are the days I wanted to know in my heart were coming, but wouldn’t have believed were possible.

These are wonderful days. I’ve never seen them before.

❤️

“This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.”

Psalms 118:24 KJV

***Oooooooh…tomorrow’s Monday. Something BIG is coming Monday. That’s tomorrow, by the way. Be sure you come back and read tomorrow’s post.***