Sometimes, I feel…if I could just concentrate enough, I could see him. As if there is a thin veil between where I exist and where Mr. Virgo exists and it’s just a bit too thick to see through. Or, if I close my eyes and really listen, really concentrate, I could hear his voice. Then I realize, that’s not likely to happen. Not in reality, anyway.
I read the other day that hallucinations are fairly common in grief and I wonder if that is the pragmatists’ way of dismissing the paranormal. I have heard numerous stories of people seeing and hearing their loved one after they die. A friend of mine saw his wife three days after she died. She told him, rather forcefully, to take his medicine. Mr. Virgo turned me around and told me to shut the bedroom window three days after he died. My aunt was standing at the airport when my grandpa tapped her on the shoulder moments after he died five states away. I saw my grandpa twice after he died.
I haven’t seen Mr. Virgo. Not in a recognizable, physical way. I’ve sensed him nearby. But not for quite a while. Maybe a part of him stayed here for awhile to comfort me in the weeks after his death. Maybe I was hallucinating in the depths of my grief. I don’t think there are any of us who wouldn’t want just one last visit. One last cup of coffee. One last conversation. One last kiss…