“A little sneak peek of the all new R-Pod 196 from Forest River…Girl Camper style!”

When Mr. Virgo and I managed a 4200 acre luxury resort in southern Colorado, we found ourselves needing a chef. One of the happy little benefits of being married to the boss was getting to sit in on the results of the chef’s “stage”. Typically, when chefs are interviewed for a position in a fine dining restaurant, they must demonstrate their skills before the person looking to hire them. This means…observing their kitchen skills while the food is being prepared, then taste testing. In our case, we were treated to three different chef stages before one was selected.

“Mr. Virgo…Forever 62…and still handsome as ever.”

Happy Heavenly Birthday, Mr. Virgo. You would have been sixty-nine today. Would you have been retired by now? Would we have pulled that camper all over the country? Would our golf game be any better? It’s hard to say, but my guess is…we would have been out hitting some balls today.

My life is so different now…I do different things. I camp and write about it. I grieve and write about it. I got married again…and I write about it! Nothing is safe anymore…it’s all blog fodder. But in a good way.

“There is another who stands with us in the fire….always.”

I cannot tell you how many times I have felt alone in my life. Totally alone. Totally forgotten. Maybe not totally worthless…but pretty darned close sometimes. When I went through my formal conversion to Judaism just before my second child was born, part of the process was to sit before the Bet Din…the Jewish Tribunal Court that determines your suitability. Did you learn all you needed to learn? Are you converting for your faith…or for your husband? How will you accomplish the very important aspect of the Jewish faith…being a contributing member of the synagogue?

“Letting things go for a little while gives your mind and heart a chance to breathe.”

I have a list as long as my arm to get accomplished in the next four days. On the upside, I don’t have a camper to clean and prep for a trip. On the downside, I still have laundry, errands, packing, planning, writing, and a couple of doctor’s appointments before I slip out of town on Thursday for the beginning of this amazing Girl Camper Trailer Tour.

Not the last book of the Bible kind. The "smack my forehead, why didn't I see that" kind. A friend of mine had to come to the river to mow yesterday. She decided to camp in her trailer up here last night so we had dinner from the grill and sat on the deck till dark. We were discussing an issue I've dealt with over the years and I made a casual remark to the effect..."I'll probably deal with this the rest of my life." She sat quietly for several seconds and in that wise, no-nonsense, shake-me-by-the-scruff-of-the-neck way I've come to appreciate, she said, "Well, you can sure do that, but it doesn't sound like much fun to me."

“What a mess! Trying to organize and choose what I’m taking on my next Girl Camper Adventure!”

When I was forced to sell my sweet little camper when I was in Colorado, I had to unpack everything and put it all in tubs to store in the bed of my truck. I knew there would be things I would need for this trip and we have been so busy since we got home, so I just left the tubs in the family room. It didn’t make sense to haul it all downstairs to storage and then have to bring it all back upstairs.

“My friend’s comfort quilt is on its way. She’s had her first dose of chemo.”

My dear friend’s quilt is on its way out west. As I sat and hand stitched the binding, I listened to praise music for a bit, then I switched over to my daily devotional. My Bible app on my phone has a function where someone reads the Bible to you. That is especially handy for my Bible plan that I’m working on. It’s planned so that you read the entire Bible in a year. I’ve only read the Bible completely once. I read it from cover to cover…from Genesis to Revelations. That’s tough. You get stuck in all those begats and Kings and it’s difficult to keep from going cross eyed. 

“Hold people’s hearts softly…with open hands.”

I’ve learned to have soft hands in my relationships. I’m not talking about getting a mani or using the latest lotions and potions. I’m talking about holding my relationships softly. I’ve learned a lot about relationships over my life. I’ve certainly had enough of them. I used to be embarrassed to say Mr. FixIt is my fourth marriage. I mean, would it have been nice to celebrate my 50th Anniversary with the man I married in 1973? Well…if it WOULD have been nice, I’d still be married to him now, wouldn’t I? Same goes for the one I married in 1979. 

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” Jack Canfield

I hear from a lot of widows who face fear as one of their most difficult symptoms of grief. Fear of the unknown…fear of being alone…fear of other people’s motives. Navigating grief is difficult enough on it’s own. Add fear, anxiety, and even full blown panic attacks and it ratchets grief up to an unbearable level. 

I’ve always had a bit of an anxious nature. Anticipatory social anxiety. Commonly called “stage fright”. I’ve come a long way in learning to control it. Sometimes it bothers me. Sometimes it doesn’t. I’ve learned the things I most want to do lie on the other side of that fear, so I have to figure out ways to get through to the other side in order to find my bliss.

“My grandma always said you can catch a lot more flies with honey than you can with vinegar.”

About thirty years ago, a woman named Anne Herbert wrote something on a placemat in a restaurant. “Practice random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty.” Since then, countless posters, books, t-shirts, and movies have incorporated this idea of doing something for others…some kindness…without expecting anything in return. Things like paying for the person behind you in the drive through at the local coffee shop. Or, leaving a basket of flowers on someone’s doorstep. Or, something I like to do every once in a while….put a sticky note on a $5 bill with a note like “God loves you!”…then tuck it in a book at the library or a book store.