“Angel on one hand, devil on the other…trying to have their way with me.”

Mr. FixIt and I haven’t had a lot of time together this summer. I was gone a lot and, even though he joined me for three weeks in Colorado, we both have been working nonstop at this and that since we got home the first week of August. Here it is September already and I’m already preparing to leave again.

“Dining alone can be an intimidating experience when you are widowed.”

I saw her walk into the restaurant with the rest of us “early birds”. The waitress came up to her table and handed her a menu.

“Just one?”

I’m sure I’m the only one in the restaurant that saw the shadow of pain skitter across her face.

“Yes.”

“Really?”

sigh

I wanted to smack the perky waitress but decided at some point in the meal, this would become a teaching moment.

“Sending some cheerful hugs, love and prayers to one of my dearest peeps!”

One of my dearest peeps is having a medical issue that will involve a lengthy period of medical treatments. I can’t be with her or give her hugs or bring her casseroles, so I’m doing the next best thing…I’m sending her a little “Comfort Quilt” to stuff in her tote and take to the hospital. I told her when she wraps herself up in it, she can feel my hugs and prayers because I’m putting both in it!

“We can help broken people by touching base with a simple ? or ❤️…just to let them know you’re thinking of them.”

I have spoken with thousands of bereaved people in the last six plus years. I have heard story after story of loss and how their grief affects them. I have learned to keep healthy boundaries so that I don’t internalize the stories and let it affect my well being. This is something I learned in the beginning of my medical career and it’s a valuable tool. 

“Grief is a process that varies from person to person…but there are some general similarities.”

The other day I read a Tweet that stopped me in my tracks. A woman said she had cut her two best friends completely out of her life because in the entire year after her niece died, neither one of them bothered to check in with her. Her comment came after someone checked in…a full two years after her tragic loss. He texted her with a very simple message…

“Thank you so much for all of your prayers. I am so grateful.”

Since June, there has been one catastrophic event after another befall my friends and family. Cancer, Stillbirth, Mental Heath Crises, Accidents, Illness, Death. One after another after another. I’ve heard it said “Bad things happen in threes.” Try three TIMES three…and then some! 

I once read the book “When Bad Things Happen to Good People” by Harold Kushner. The author is a Conservative Rabbi and the book addressed the long standing debate: If God is loving and caring, how can so many bad things happen to good people? While the book was written in 1981, I turned to it in 2001 after 9/11.

“When your internet is powered by hamsters, you need to find alternatives.”

Internet service is spotty when you live in the boonies. So is cell phone service. And, if you live WAY out in the boonies, the only way you can even USE a cellphone is if it is a iPhone and connected to the wonky country internet. It’s a Catch 22. 

I finally bought an internet “booster”. It doesn’t make your internet any faster or less fluctuating, but it does allow what crappy internet service you DO have to reach down the hall to the bedroom. I’m been known to talk like a sailor when I’m trying to meet a deadline working from home. 

“The dragonflies are prolific this year!”

I love dragonflies. They serve a good purpose by eating mosquitos and other flying insects and they don’t bite humans! I am charmed by them. They will light on your finger or your shoulder. They hover around you as if to keep you company or to satisfy their curiosity. The other day I was leaving the doctor’s office and one flew alongside my window for at least a quarter mile. They make me smile.

“Mr. FixIt says our pear trees have never produced…he thought they were ornamental. This year, they’re loaded!”

The other day I had to have a fasting blood draw for some tests. When I came out of the lab, I was humming a praise song as I walked through the lobby. “Your promise still stands…great is your faithfulness, your faithfulness.” 

The woman in front of me turned around and gave me a huge smile and said, “You must be really happy! I’m a singer, too. I’m always walking around singing.”

“A trip down memory lane takes me to the neighborhood grocery store.”

Do you remember when women dressed up to go to the grocery store? I ran across this picture on Facebook last night when I was searching for something else and it just brought back such a flood of memories. I love looking at all the details. Diet Pepsi was a thing…even in the mid ‘60s. Some of us were debating whether this was a staged photo-op because of the total on the cash register.