I was sitting with my older daughter and her friend the other night talking about mental illness and how so many issues of today are losing their negative social stigmas. We've come a long way since those dark days when depression and anxiety cast a pall over our house. So, we want to do our part to bring mental health issues into the light of day where we can talk and love and heal.

I love live music. I love listening to groups I have never heard and discovering something new through their music. The other day it was Rage Against the Machine with Killing in the Name Of. Wednesday night it was SHEL, a group consisting of four sisters with their tremendous harmonies that you commonly find in siblings. They are quirky, fun, and delightfully different. Last night it was Biff Gore who was on Season 6 of The Voice with a great dance band. Dancing to live music is liberating. It releases something primal in us. We become the hunter/gatherers around the campfire seeking community with those around us. We get lost in the rhythm of our people. It's joyful. It plants our feet on the earth. We step out of our comfort zone of the treadmill we're on and join in.

This is my friend, Tony. He lost his battle with MS a few months ago. We'll be remembering him with a memorial service this Saturday. Tony was a charmer. A dentist by profession, but a skier, runner, biker, friend, and father extraordinaire. He volunteered for the ski patrol till he couldn't do it anymore. I first met Tony when we moved into the house across the street from he and his family. My late mother-in-law was visiting from out of town and had a sudden dental emergency. Tony dropped what he was doing and met us in the office in the middle of the night so she could have pain relief.

When I was planning Mr. Virgo's funeral, I was dismayed at the priest's lack of cooperation in the details. I had several songs I wanted shared and speakers we loved to say a few words. He said those things did not belong in a traditional Catholic funeral and having never been to one, I knew no different. I didn't have it in me to fight anyway. It was a nice service…but I felt it could have been so much more if there were tributes and music. So, yesterday I went to the cemetery armed with my iPad and played all of Mr. Virgo's favorite songs, including those I had chosen for his funeral. Nessun Dorma, Ave Maria, To Where You Are, Go Rest High on That Mountain…among others. There were abundant bluebirds and butterflies. I brought a couple of rocks from WV to place on his grave. And I found this…a pack of Pall Malls, his brand since he started smoking them in Vietnam. Even though these are what killed him, I was touched to see someone had been thinking of him and came to visit leaving the familiar green box behind. There are little stones and a penny placed carefully on the rocks surrounding him…all mementoes left to let me know someone was there. As long as we keep our loved ones in our hearts and their names on our lips, they are never completely gone.

There is seldom a situation that I can't learn something from. If I really stay aware of my surroundings and read what is happening in my interactions with others, I can learn amazing things…about the world, about myself, about humanity.

I left Denver yesterday morning to go to the mountains for a few days. As I accelerated onto the interstate, my truck engine started missing and the "check engine" light came on. If you remember correctly, this happened just a couple of weeks ago when I was heading into the mountains pulling my trailer and I had to get towed back to town. This time the light went off and I prayed my way to the same Ford dealership with the engine running a little rough but running nonetheless. It turns out I had a cracked spark plug. I had all six replaced as well as the coil boots…something you have to have done if your spark plugs have been arcing because that burns holes in them. Water can leak in and then you have bigger problems with your electrical system.

Yesterday was a pretty near perfect day. We've been waiting and planning for this day for several months. The kids' 20th anniversary party went off without a hitch and it was so wonderful to see family and friends from near and far. The band, the music, the dancing, the food, the weather, the company…it was just delightful! I'm heading up to the mountains today to visit with my brother and my friends for a few days. I was talking with my friend last night and we marveled at how it's nearly August. In some ways the summer has stretched out in a way I haven't experienced since childhood. But it's really going to fly by now with so many activities planned and before you know it, I'll be back on the banks of the Ohio River.

There are fewer milestones in life that fill you with more pride than that of your children's accomplishments. Today we are celebrating Daughter #1's 20th wedding anniversary. She and my favorite son-in-law (I can say that…I only have one) have a beautiful marriage, a beautiful family, and a beautiful life together. They are steady, easy going, and as sweet with each other today as they were the day they married. And in-laws? OMGosh! She won the in-law lottery! I absolutely LOVE my son-in-law and his family. Good, hard working people that are as much my sister and brother as they are my dearest friends. We share grandchildren. We celebrate our joined family. That's priceless!

It's all the rage! It's the fastest growing sport in America. Played with a paddle and what resembles a wiffle ball on a court half the size of a tennis court, it's catching on with seniors as a way to stay fit and have fun. Socialization is as much a part of Pickleball as the rules of the game. And it's much easier on your body than say, tennis or racquetball.

Ok, remember when I was lamenting the demise of my favorite shoes? I have worn these Chaco sandals for 20 years and the sole was almost worn off and the foot bed was starting to crack as a result. Many of you informed me of the Chaco Lifetime Warranty but that will only cover manufacturer's defects, not 20 years of good, honest wear and tear. While I was on their website, I discovered their Re-Chaco program. The price of repairs depend on what you need done. To have my trusty old shoes resoled cost me $47, including shipping! I got them yesterday and I was SO excited. The downside is I had already bought a new pair and while they are perfectly fine, they just didn't fit quite right. My daughter's sandals kicked the bucket yesterday so guess who has a brand new pair of Chaco's? She suffers from plantar fasciitis like me so I'm hoping they work for her as much as this brand has worked for me.

When you travel through life and keep your focus on the past, your view will never, ever change. You can't rewrite history. It is what it is. I was talking with my friend the other night. We've both gone through the death of a spouse. I was talking about this blog and how it has evolved since Mr. Virgo died. I can go back and read my posts of two years ago and one year ago and they are vastly different than now. The natural progression through grief has brought me to a place where I seldom look back and grieve for times past. My focus now is forward, embracing what life brings. In some ways, it's like the scene in Titanic where Rose stands on the bow of the ship and closes her eyes to feel the wind rush over her. My focus is now on life, not death. Light, not dark. Oh, there are still triggers that remind me of where I've been, but they are no longer anchors that hold me fast to the bottom. They are wakes from the passing ships that rock me, sometimes severely, but there is a limit to their power. They pass.