“Stormy Seas”

I can hear the surf through the open window of the condo. It rained all day yesterday with a pretty strong wind coming in off the ocean which raised the surf to choppy white-capped waves. We didn’t let the steady rain keep us indoors, though. Mr. FixIt cooked a big breakfast and we headed out to explore the many antique shops on the island. I got some really great ideas for decorating the ‘67 Franklin. I hope to get started on it soon, although I am not sure I can get it done for camping this season.

There is no way to avoid bumping into grief. It’s around the corner. On any given day, something...anything...can trigger a grief response. Sometimes it’s a whisper. Sometimes it’s a roar. It’s such a relief when things are going smoothly and the interruption is just a riffle in the stream. That’s what happened yesterday when I opened Facebook and there was one of those “memories” right in my face. There was a time that would have knocked me flat. Instead, I felt the sting then let it go. It will always be there in one form or another. I just try not to focus on it so much anymore. That doesn’t always work, but it did this time.

“Turtles at the aquarium.”

“Love: No Crowds! Hate: Down Coat on the Beach!”

What do I love about being at the beach this time of year? NO crowds! There isn’t a wait at the restaurants. There’s practically no traffic. It’s easy to feel like you live here. The shops are filled with fresh merchandise that’s fun to look through.

What do I hate about the beach this time of year? Having to wear a down coat to walk on it!

“He’s a Texan!”

Mr. FixIt is a great travel companion. I have absolutely no sense of direction so between him and Mavis the GPS, I always know just what turn is coming up and what lane to be in. And, unlike Mavis, Mr. FixIt has a million stories that keep me laughing the whole way.

He was telling me about his grandmother yesterday as we drove. Get this…his grandma brought four little boys under the age of ten all the way down here in the mid ‘50s and camped in a tent in a state park for two months at a time…by herself! No electric. No water hookup. No showers. She cooked on a campfire and let these little boys run like the wind. I am in awe of her…I would have LOVED to have met her.

“Dogwood”

We had an amazing visit with my cousin and his wife this weekend. Instead of running around and doing things like we usually do while we were there, I was content to stay put and visit with this most beloved man. Our visits are numbered and I am always pleasantly surprised at his resilience and positive determination. He assured me he will be around a while so I told him I’m counting on that.

“It’s ok to unplug.”

What happens when you have to “dig in and go dark?” When you have the diagnosis, you’ve gone through the years of treatments, nothing else is working, so your spouse makes the decision you have dreaded from the beginning…no more? That was the question posed to me. It’s different for everyone and I don’t know for sure…I haven’t suffered this particular hell. But, my answer was this. Do what you need to do and don’t apologize for it.

My friend Kimberly C. Paul interviewed me as one the first guests on her “Death by Design Podcast. She is a TedX speaker and the author of the recently release book, Bridging the Gap. (I’ll leave a link at the bottom of the page.) Kimberly worked for 18 years in Hospice and has gathered her experiences and stories together. She will have you smiling and crying and thinking as she covers the lessons her hospice patients taught her about life...and more importantly...death.

Death is largely swept under the rug in our society. We don’t want to talk about it. Too sad. Too scary. Too icky. We will plan the heck out of a surprise birthday party but leave our death up to our spouse or kids to clean up after. It’s like the baby that covers his eyes and thinks you can’t see him. You aren’t fooling anyone. We’re all going to die. Why not do it on our own terms?

“Magic Fred dancing at Mountain Fair”

We called him “Magic Fred.” Fred “Lightning Heart” Haberlien was a fixture in the Roaring Fork Valley where I lived for 28 years. He was an incredible muralist. His paintings grace buildings and silos all across Colorado, bringing warmth and light to spaces once overlooked or deemed an eyesore.

I first met Fred when his wife Teresa interviewed for a position in Hubby #2’s medical practice somewhere in the late ‘80s. He was a shaman, a medicine man, a spirit dancer. With his long hair pulled back into a ponytail and his signature hat, Fred could soon be found all over town spreading his love and light. When he met you…everytime he met you…he handed you a polished rock. He gave you a piece of his Earth Mother to hold and keep. He was generous to a fault, a peaceful man. I never saw anything rattle him.

“Faith or Fear?”

I love my readers. And I love how God uses them to teach me things. “Betty” (not her real name) sent me a message yesterday morning. She found a little typo and wanted to let me know. Everyone knows I’m a stickler for good grammar and I have a few who help me catch things when they slip through. She always signs off with “WALK STRONG.” I wrote back that I was trying, but I have a few things I’m facing in the coming weeks that I could use some extra prayers for. Immediately, “Betty” came back with a valuable reminder.

“Back to Square One”

I need to exercise more! After sitting on my hiney all winter long writing and working on my website, I went out Friday and Saturday and worked in the yard. As I began my two hour excursion on the riding mower, the word “sunscreen” flitted through my mind like a feather on the wind and was gone just as quickly. After all, I had a broad brimmed hat on…what could go wrong? Ohhhh…I paid for that Saturday night. I couldn’t find anything in the house to put on my sunburned arms and shoulders and felt too miserable to even think about looking up home remedies on the internet. Then yesterday morning I tried to get out of bed and discovered muscles I’d forgotten I had. The word grumpy comes to mind. I turned over and went back to sleep and ended up missing morning services.